Reaction & Review | The Old Dark House

Welcome, one and all, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, ladies and gentlemen, I'm covering a horror comedy from 1932. That movie is "The Old Dark House".

Now, I came across this movie sometime ago on YouTube, when I was trying to search for older movies to cover for this series. And this one caught my interest because of it's premise. The plot to this movie involves a family that takes shelter at this house overnight during a thunderstorm, and they have to deal with this family that owns this house. And, I'm going to assume, creepy shit happens from there involving this family.

Now, there's a couple of other reasons why this movie caught my interest. The first one is that this plot reminds me of another movie that is similar to this, which was "Clue: The Movie". And, as I made mentioned before, I loved "Clue: The Movie". The only difference between that movie and this one is that in "Clue: The Movie", the characters were invited to this mansion during a thunderstorm, conveniently. I won't tell you who they were invited by, you're gonna have to watch that movie for yourself. In this one, as I just stated, our characters are taking shelter from a thunderstorm, because they have nowhere else to stay for the night. Now, admittedly, this story may not sound original, but back in 1932, this was, probably something different for it's time. So I'm hoping that the movie will be able to make this premise work.

The other reason that this movie caught my interest is that this movie, as I have stated before, is advertised as a horror comedy. And I'm very curious to see how a movie from this time period is able to play itself off as a horror comedy. I should mention that I prefer horror comedies over straight up horror movies. And being that this is a horror comedy from 1932, I'm hoping that this thing will be genuinely funny. But the only way I'm gonna know how funny this movie can possibly be, is if I shut up, and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "The Old Dark House".

4 minutes later

That thing is suppose to be a map? It looks like a piece of leather that came from a wet jacket. I understand that because it's raining, it's suppose to look wet and unreadable. But, guys, I'm gonna tell you, that thing looks nothing like a map. Just thought I'd mention.

11 minutes later

OK, guys, there's something a little bit creepy about Rebecca's face changing with each shot of a different mirror, while she's talking about how her sister died. That is a little bit unsettling.

16 minutes later

Now, I have a bit of a question, and it's kind of a serious one. So, this family knows that Morgan gets violent whenever he starts drinking. If they know that much, then shouldn't they stash away the stuff Morgan drinks somewhere, so that he wouldn't be able to have access to it? Or, barring that, did the idea of just pouring out the drinks never occur to them? I understand that I may be putting too much thought into this, but those ideas just came to me, you know?

20 minutes later

You know, out of all the things I was expecting in this movie, I was not expecting this older guy to have an incredibly feminine voice for his age. It sounds very out of place to me, and I was totally not expecting that.

7 minutes later

Hold on a fucking second here. So instead of doing what Rebecca says and go to her room, Gladys and Margaret are going to stay inside the room that they are currently in. Knowing full well that Morgan has, potentially, let someone out, that has set fire to this house before, and wants to kill. I swear, guys, if neither one of them ends up being dead by the time this thing is over, I'm going to be a little pissed.

The Review

Well, guys, that was "The Old Dark House". Let me shut the movie off...OK. That was...rather interesting. Now to actually talk about this thing.

I want to start with one of the reasons why I wanted to watch this movie in the first place. I said at the start of this Reaction & Review that this movie was advertised as a horror comedy. And, as I made mentioned before, I love horror comedies. And seeing that this movie was made in 1932, I wanted to see how a horror comedy from that time period could work out. Well, after watching this movie, I'm not really sure if this movie was meant to be a horror comedy. I could see sprinkles of it being added in a few scenes, but none of it felt like I was going to bust a gut laughing. Now, one thing I didn't mention until now is that this movie is based off a novel by J.B. Priestley. I'm not really sure if there was more humor in the novel than in this movie, or if there was any humor at all. Either way, this movie does not feel like a horror comedy at all. And I am a little disappointed in that. Because, I wanted to laugh at anything in this movie, and the closest thing to it is when certain characters such as Penderel, Gladys, or Porterhouse have to share dialogue. Mainly because, they are there, mostly, to lighten the mood. And while it kinda works here, I still didn't feel like laughing. Now, it might be because my taste in humor is a little different compared to others, but, as I said, nothing here felt genuinely funny, and I feel that it was a missed opportunity for this movie to do anything with it's humor, or lack thereof. Now, I don't want you to take that as me dumping on this movie, because I'm not. I just feel like calling this movie a horror comedy is a bit misleading.

Now, setting aside the idea of whether or not this movie was meant to be a horror comedy, the writing here is still really good. Our story here is about this couple, and their friend, who have to stay over at this dark house, because the rain is just pouring down, and won't let up until morning. And then we get to learn about the Femm family, the people who owns this dark house. Well, more so Rebecca, according to Horace. But anyway, we learn more about this family's history. We learn about their silent butler, Morgan, who gets very dangerous when he's drunk. I want to touch upon that for a moment, because I'm still trying to wrap my head around the idea of that. So, this family knows that Morgan is a heavy drinker, and that he will go on a rampage while drunk. If that's the case, then wouldn't getting rid of any alcoholic drinks be the best idea? Because we are told at one point during the movie by Horace that Morgan is known to be dumb. So rather than taking advantage of this, and getting rid of the drinks so that Morgan wouldn't know where they are, they just let it be because, I guess, they didn't plan that far ahead. Again, I totally understand that it's probably trivial, and stupid, but I still think they could've done something about it. We don't really get a ton of background on Morgan, himself, outside of him being a dangerous drunk, but I'm willing to give most of it a pass. Then we have Horace, who, as far as I know, has the least amount of depth amongst the entire Femm family. The only thing that he ever reveals to our cast of characters staying overnight is that he's wanted by the police, but we really don't get anything beyond that. And then we have Rebecca, who's probably the most interesting out of the entire Femm family. She's mostly deaf, which causes our characters to have to yell at her up-close so she can understand what they're saying. There is one moment with her that seemed a little bit off to me. So, at one point during the beginning of the movie, we get to see her escorting Margaret upstairs to her room, so that Margaret can change clothes. And then Rebecca tells this story to her about how her sister died. She mentions how her was sister was sinful and godless, and then tells Margaret that she is sinful, too. Because of what she looks like, how her skin is white, and how she will rot, including the clothes she wears. And all of this from Rebecca comes across as a little bit mean-spirited. Now, mind you, between the two characters, Rebecca is the more likable character. Mainly because, Margaret does not have any real personality to speak of. But I just felt like it was a little bit off-putting to me. Now, setting aside from that, Rebecca is probably the most likable character in the entire movie.

As for our other characters, specifically the ones who have to stay overnight, most of them are rather likable and have quite a bit of depth. I'm mainly talking about characters such as Penderel, Gladys, and Porterhouse. As for Margaret and Philip, they really don't have any kind of interesting personalities or depth, at all. As for the other three I mentioned, Gladys and Porterhouse are in a...how should I say, platonic relationship, and Gladys has more of love interest for Penderel, than she does for Porterhouse. And the character depth between them is rather good. I will say that, when it comes to this sort of horror movie, it actually makes me care about most of the characters, because they are rather likable. And even though I said that Margaret and Philip don't really have a ton of depth, at least they're not painfully irritating. They're just...kinda there. But anyway, this is something that I wish certain horror movies would take note of. I want them to make me care about their characters. I am not asking for a ton of depth, especially when it comes to either horror or action movies, but, at the very least, give me a reason to care about them. And this movie proves that you can pull this off. Now, while it may fail as a horror comedy, it does still have strong writing. Enough to know that you are going to care about these characters, whether they have a ton of depth or not. Now, when I say certain horror movies, I'm mainly referring to the films I've seen, especially for this series, such as "The Neighbor No. 13." and "Shock Labyrinth". Where, those movies failed to try and establish any likable characters, and the stories for those movies suffers because of it. "The Old Dark House", on the other hand, shows you that you can still have likable characters, and tell an interesting story at the same time. And again, even though there were two characters in this movie that didn't really have a ton of personality or depth, the rest of the other interesting characters outweighs the other two, so much so that you're not going to mind the fact those two characters are kinda lifeless. Because the story is still really solid, and is able to pull through well enough.

What also makes these characters work is the acting. The acting, for the most part, is really good. I did feel like, at the very beginning of the movie, the actors who were playing Margaret and Philip overacted their scenes a little bit. Now, it may have been intentional, because they were trying to drive through a rainstorm, but I did feel like it was worth mentioning. And as the movie went on, their acting did get a lot better, and they were able to get into their roles really well. There is one actor, though, I do need to talk about, which is Boris Karloff. In case you are wondering, Karloff plays the silent butler; Morgan. And he stands out amongst the rest of the cast because he's the only actor in this movie who has no dialogue. You mostly hear Karloff grunting his lines when he has to try and play off the fact that he's kinda stupid. Which is not a bad thing at all, because he's still able to turn a great showing. One other reason why Boris Karloff stands out for me is because this is, probably, one of the very first movies that I've seen that has Boris Karloff in it. And to those who are into classic cinema will probably thinks that's blasphemy, because, apparently, I haven't really seen enough classic cinema, and to think that I haven't watched any with Boris Karloff until now is, somehow, criminal. Now, I'm not going to deny Boris Karloff's status as a legendary actor, I'm just saying that this is the first movie that I've seen him in, and he has no dialogue. And there may come a time where I will watch another movie with Boris Karloff in it, and he will have some sort of speaking role. Now, beyond all of that, Karloff's acting in this movie is great, for the few times that he has to simply grunt his lines. And the rest of the cast turns in a really good showing, too. So the acting in this movie is great, for the most part.

The only real special effect in this movie is makeup effects, and just about all of this is on Boris Karloff. The one noticeable feature you will see on him, when you watch this movie, is that he has two scars on his face. One on his nose, and one about his right eye. And they both look really good on him. There is also fire towards the end of the movie, but I'm not going to go too deep into that, on the off chance you want to go and see this movie for yourself. But I will say that it is the only other special effect that is used in this movie, and it is put to good use, too.

Camerawork is pretty good, although I did notice a couple of times in this movie where the camera will have a couple of unnecessary jump cuts. One of them happens when Penderel is talking with Gladys in a car. As they're talking, Penderel has his elbow standing while he's holding his head. And then suddenly, we cut over to when Gladys is talking, and Penderel is not holding his head anymore. It was rather noticeable, but it's not really enough where it took me out of the movie. There are also a couple of other jump cuts that happened, and I'm not totally sure if it's the version of it I'm watching on YouTube, but again, it's not going to take you out of the movie, even if you happen to notice it. Aside from that, camerawork is pretty good. Lighting here is done really well. Sound-mix is decent. There is almost no music in this movie. The only times you get to hear music is during the intro as the movie starts, and during the very end as the credits is showing the cast list. And that works incredibly well because, most modern horror movies have to shoehorn in some bullshit, bland, horror movie score that, either, doesn't really work, or is out of place. This movie relies solely on it's atmosphere, and it works beautifully here. This is what more horror movies should take note of. This movie shows you how to build atmosphere, without relying on some generic score that would hamper most horror movies.

So, when all is said and done, am I able to recommend "The Old Dark House"? If you're looking for something different when it comes to horror movies, then yes, I would totally recommend it. I do have to warn you, though, that if you are going into this movie, and you're expecting this movie to be a horror comedy, you're not going to find that here. As I stated before, this movie barely has any comedy in it, and I, personally, don't think that this movie was meant to be a horror comedy. So, on that end, it falls rather short. But as a straight-up horror movie, it lives up to that rather well. And I can totally recommend it, based off that alone. So yeah, guys, this movie was pretty good. And while it may not live up to being a horror comedy, it does do things rather well that most modern horror movies fail to do. So, I can say that this movie is sort of a trade off, and I'm more than happy to take that kind of trade off. Now, with all this mind, I kinda want to go back and re-watch "Clue: The Movie". Because, even though I normally save watching that movie during the month of Halloween, I wanted to watch something with more comedy in it, and "Clue: The Movie" has all of that. So, I'm gonna go watch that, after I'm done putting this review together.

Anyway, guys, with that, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all in the near future. Peace.

Reaction & Review | Rollerball

 

Welcome, one and all, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, ladies and gentlemen, I'm covering a movie from 2002. That movie is "Rollerball".

Now as much I would like to give you a ton of information about this movie, I can't. What I can tell you is that this movie is, apparently, a remake from 1975 with the same name. I honestly had no idea that this movie was even a remake of anything, until I decided to look up the scant bit of research that I did on this thing. So I can say that this is going to be the first remake I'm covering for this series. I can tell you that it's about a violent sport that the main character takes a part of. Which, OK, that does sound sorta interesting. I'm kinda hoping that the movie will make it interesting.

I can also tell you one other thing that I do know about this movie. And it has to do with two people from the world of professional wrestling making cameo appearances in this movie. One of them is Paul Heyman, who is the mastermind of ECW. And the other cameo comes from Shane McMahon, who is the son of WWE Chairman, and a man who should honestly retire by this point, Vince McMahon. I know about Shane's cameo, because I've seen at least one clip from this movie where it involves how much time he's actually in the movie. But I'm not sure how much of a role Paul Heyman is going to play in this movie. It might just be a one off appearance, or he might be in the movie for much longer. Who knows? But I'm going to find out soon enough.

Honestly, guys, I have no idea what to expect from this movie. Since it is a remake, don't expect me to compare it with the original film from 1975, because I've never seen it. I am certainly hoping for this movie to be pretty good. But the only way I'm gonna find out, is if I shut up, and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "Rollerball".

6 minutes later

So, hold on a second here. So, this guy picked up John from his car, after John was doing some sort of stupid skateboard race with another guy while on their backs. Rather than accepting the invitation to qualify for Rollerball, John, instead, refuses the offer, and gets out of his friend's car. He DOES know that the cops are still after him, right? See? Right there! The cops are right across the block from where he's standing at. Are you telling me that none of these cops notice him, after getting out of his friend's car? I'm really sorry, guys, but that is just incredibly stupid, to me.

15 minutes later

Guys, I know that this is a trivial thing to be bringing up, but out of all these helmets that I've seen so far in this movie, Rebecca Romijn-Stamos's helmet looks, by far, the stupidest. She looks like a shitty villain I would see out of a Tokusou Sentai series. I wish she would take that stupid thing off her head, because I can't really take her seriously with that helmet on her head. Again, I understand that it's a trivial, and stupid, thing to be bitching about. But it's just sorta bugging me a bit, you know?

17 minutes later

So, guys, are we actually going to get a conflict in this movie that's halfway interesting? So far, this story has gone nowhere fast, our characters are shallow and shit, and you would think I would care about Jonathan hooking up with Rebecca Romijn-Stamo's character in this movie, but no, I don't. I'm genuinely hoping that the story will pick up within the next hour or so, but right now, my hopes of that happening are kinda slim.

7 minutes later

Well, guys, I am willing to say this much. The soundtrack in this thing, so far, is fucking awesome. Why? Because this song that's playing right now is from Rob Zombie. And almost anything from Rob Zombie, music wise, is always awesome to listen to. It's kinda sad that the only positive I can find in this movie is the soundtrack. But, hey, I'm willing to take any positive that I can get out of this thing.

9 minutes later

You know, guys, I would love to say that this accident involving Aurora's bike catching fire would've been awesome...if the effects leading up to it weren't noticeably shit. That was just terribly done. And it, kinda, ruined what would've been a cool scene.

8 minutes later

Oh...my...god...and just when I thought this movie couldn't get any worse, this entire scene is shot in night vision. Really poorly shot, too, because it's making the picture quality in this scene look like absolute shit. My god, guys, I was kinda hoping that this movie would be sorta interesting. But it's not. And with this shit involving night vision, it's taking a kinda shitty movie and making it worse. I cannot wait for this scene to end.

18 minutes later

OK, I have a question. It's probably a stupid one, but I'm going to ask it anyway. So, the rules have been changed to anything goes for this final Rollerball game. There are no foul plays or disqualifications. Basically, the players know that it's going to lead to certain death with these rule changes. Shouldn't the players like, I don't know, walk out on this shit? Because if you know that these rules are going to be played with no consequences, shouldn't you at least take a stand against the corrupt people who own Rollerball and say that you're not going to partake in this game? I understand that I'm putting logic into a movie that seems allergic to it, but it was just something that came to me, you know?

The Review

Well, guys, that was "Rollerball". Dear god...was that "Rollerball". Plus side is, we're closing out with an awesome song from Rob Zombie. And I know it's awesome, because this song was Edge's old theme back during the early 2000's. Now, as much as I would like to continue jamming out to this song, I have to review this shitbag movie. So, I'm gonna go ahead and shut the movie off...OK. Now, I have to talk about this thing. Let's start with the writing.

You guys happen to remember earlier when I mentioned that this movie was a remake of another film with the same name from 1975? I really hope that movie had more writing than this, because this movie has no story. The closest we have to a plot is that we have the promoter of Rollerball trying to garner ratings by getting the players hurt in some way, shape, or form, so that the ratings will stay up in hopes of him getting a TV deal in America. In other words, this story is a cliche, bullshit, plot you would see in movies centered around music, where we have a corrupt manager, and the singer tries to get back at them in some way. Well, instead of a singer, we have Jonathan, our main character, who's this big star of Rollerball, and he's trying to get back at our corrupt promoter, who's trying to cause injuries to other players and making the game more 'real' than it should. I want to touch upon that, and I need to do that by talking about the last game of Rollerball. So, I mentioned earlier that the game rules have been changed for this game of Rollerball, where we would have no rules, and, basically, anything goes. The players can do what they please, and no fouls or disqualifications would be a factor. This shit makes no fucking sense because, first of all, the entire last game is a giant clusterfuck. Where too much shit is happening, and the rules are almost, literally, thrown out the window. Basically, I want you to imagine WWE booking a wrestling match where there are constant interference's by random wrestlers throughout the entire match, and none of it makes any sense as to why this is happening. That's what I got out of this, when I was watching this part of the movie. What makes it even more confusing is the motivation from our villain, who, despite getting told repeatedly that they should stop this because it's getting out of hand, he just decides to keep it going, even though there are ton of players bleeding, getting injured, to a point where they begin to walk out of the game. Well, except for Jonathan, who has no choice but to continue playing the game. I'll get to him when I talk about the characters. But anyway, the owner doesn't care and just insists on continuing to show everything. Now, I have a question, and this is kind of a serious one. If you're an owner of a sporting event, such as Rollerball, and you're trying to get a TV deal in America, don't you think it would make more sense as to put on the best show you could possibly come up with and NOT resort to a clusterfuck where players are getting injured, bleeding, and you would not have them turn against you if things were already getting out of hand? I don't know. Maybe that's just a little common sense on my part. And the asshole who wrote this, obviously, doesn't have any. 

So not only do we have a story that borders on plotless, and what little writing here makes no sense, we also have characters who are all shallow and lifeless. Now, I don't know if there were any characters who had some level of depth from the 1975 movie, because, again, I haven't seen the 1975 "Rollerball" movie. But if there were, then any depth they had is completely non-existent in this remake. We have our main character, Jonathan. Who, in the span of a few months, instantly becomes a big star of Rollerball. I would've like to have seen his climb to the top during those few months. Say, maybe make a montage of him climbing the ranks of becoming a top star of a sporting event, but hey, I guess character development doesn't really matter for this movie. Now granted, it would've been cliche if they did go that route, but, honestly, it probably would've added to this movie being kinda cheesy, and make it sorta fun to watch. But that's just me, personally. We have Ridley, who, outside of being Jonathan's friend, has no fucking character to speak of. Then we have Aurora, who is Rebecca Romijn-Stamo's character in this movie, and she and Jonathan share a love interest for each other. And the way they hook up makes no sense, either. Because we see them bickering with each other in the beginning of the movie. Now, when I saw them on the front cover of this movie, I kinda had a feeling they were going to be paired up, anyways, but the movie could've built it up to something halfway decent. Instead, the way we get them paired up comes right the fuck out of nowhere. Because at one point, we get to see Jonathan return to the locker room by himself, and he ends up seeing Aurora, who is half naked while training. And in a moment of fuck you, that's why, they end up kissing because we needed to shoehorn in a romantic relationship, rather than trying to develop our characters until we get to that point. Speaking of which, Jonathan is not only unlikable, but stupid as hell, because before we get to the final Rollerball game, he tries to make a deal with our evil owner that he doesn't want to see Aurora around. He doesn't want her involved in the event. He just wants her to stay away, period. And what do you know? The owner ends up putting Aurora on the opposing team because he was obviously going to stay true to his word. And rather than trying to do something about it, Jonathan just decides to play the game, because he does just about anything that the owner tells him. And I know that the owner has a name, but because his character was so bland and lifeless, I couldn't remember what it was. Anyway, Jonathan doesn't have the common sense to see if there's an alternative plan until he gets his shit caved in at the last moment where he decides to skate around the Rollerball rink, and throw the ball at the owner's face. I won't go any further than that, on the off chance you want to see what happens to him in this movie. But ultimately, guys, the writing in this thing is so dead and buried, that almost none of it makes any sense.

Now, I will say that, despite the writing being incredibly shit, the acting is halfway decent from our main cast. I wasn't expecting much from LL Cool J, but he was able to turn in a decent showing. So I can at least say that I won't be dreading about seeing LL Cool J's name on a cast list, because he was able to show me that he could act. Now, even though the main cast turned in a halfway decent showing, there is one actor in this movie who phones it in, and this one I'm rather disappointed in. And it's, of all people, Paul Heyman. For those who don't know, Paul Heyman is one of the greatest wrestling managers of all time. He's able to cut almost masterful promos and can make you care about what he says. In terms of cutting promos, he's usually mentioned in the same breath as The Rock, John Cena, Stone Cold Steve Austin, CM Punk, and I would even go so far as to mention Vince McMahon, when he's not trying to ham up his promos. But anyway, Paul Heyman is awesome, when he's able to cut a really good promo. Why then, is he phoning in such a terrible performance here? In case you are wondering, he's not just making a cameo appearance, as I thought he was going to do. He's in the movie as a commentator for the Rollerball games. And you would think that would sound amazing, except, most of the time, he sounds like he doesn't fucking care. There are rare glimpses of him when he sounds like he gives a shit, but most of the time, it's just him acting bored and is only in the movie for a paycheck. And that's really shameful, because I remember listening to his stuff when he was doing commentary for WWE during the early 2000's, and that stuff was amazing. And, mind you, this movie came out in 2002. So what the fuck happened here, Paul? Why were you phoning in such a god awful performance in this movie, when you were doing such amazing commentary during the Invasion angle? It just really boggles my mind because I know Paul Heyman can do better than this. Now, to give you a comparison, I mentioned Shane McMahon's cameo at the start of this. I'm gonna spoil his entire appearance in this movie. So, at one point, our corrupt owner is throwing a tyrant at some guy, while holding a gun. And the camera will focus in on Shane, as he turns around and just stares at the owner the entire time. And I'm gonna tell you, those few shots that Shane were in, he gave a masterful performance with a look that shows that he cared. And that is almost terrifying because, out of the entire McMahon family that's able to cut promos, Shane McMahon isn't exactly the best out of all of them. He's only above Linda and Stephanie, because Linda barely ever spoke during her time in WWE, and Stephanie McMahon, well current Stephanie anyway, is fucking garbage every time she opens her mouth to speak, and is one of the many reasons why WWE's current product is unwatchable. But I'm getting way off track here. My point is, Shane McMahon turned in a better performance than Paul Heyman, and that is almost sad and tragic. But as for the rest of the cast, they were able to turn in decent showings, especially considering the script that they were handed.

Costuming here is pretty good, and even though I still can't get over that stupid helmet that Aurora was wearing before her motorbike crashed, the helmets on almost everyone else were kinda decent. And I do think it kinda adds to the small layer of cheese in this movie, so I can give costuming here a bit of a positive. Speaking of Aurora's bike, let's talk about special effects, shall we? I brought this up during the reaction portion of the movie, but this one effect ruined a scene that would, normally, be great. So before Aurora rides her bike, we see this one guy from the opposing team cut off one of the hoses of Aurora's bike, which causes the gas to leak as she rides around the track. And then we see this guy again as he places a lit-up cigar down to where most of the gas has spilled. This causes a trail of fire to follow where Aurora has ridden. Now, that would look and sound awesome. Unfortunately, the fire effects were done in CG. And that wouldn't be so bad, except, when you get to see the fire up close from the motorbike crashing, the CG, even for the standards of 2002, were complete shit. And, as I just stated, it ruined would could've been an awesome looking scene. Now, even though the CG for the fire was terrible, I can say that the practical effects for stuff such as blood and makeup effects look great, especially during the final part of the movie where you get to see a ton of blood, and that stuff looked amazing.

Camerawork...oh boy. Camerawork, for the most part, is pretty good...until we get to one scene which looked hideously shot. And lighting is also going to come into play as well. Because there's one scene in the movie where it is shot with night vision. And it's a scene where Jonathan and Ridley are on the run towards the Russian border. This entire scene is shot, and lit, so poorly, that it will you pull you out of this movie entirely.  Because it looks as though it was shot in production, and they were just trying to fill in time for this movie. And just to add in a god awful chase scene, the picture quality during all this looks like shit. Now, I understand that because this scene was shot with night vision, you're not going to expect the best kind of picture quality. But, guys, I have seen terrible TV shows such as "Ghost Hunters" where they used night vision, and it didn't look half as bad as the shit that was in this movie. And, mind you, this movie had a $70 million dollar budget. Are you telling me that they couldn't afford proper lighting to film this scene without using night vision? It's just, my god, I have never seen something shot so badly, and you add terrible night vision on top of it, just to make your scene un-fucking-watchable. And that scene drags on for quite a while, too. On the subject of camerawork, we also get quite a few unnecessary jump cuts, where it'll focus on Jonathan on some shots, and, for whatever reason, these jump cuts come in, and it adds nothing to these scenes. So either it was filmed poorly, or it was, somehow, a stylistic choice from the people who edited this shit together. I'm going with the former, because I don't think any proper filmmaker would go to the lengths of using unnecessary jump cuts. Now, beyond all of that bullshit, the camerawork here is decent, as is the lighting. Sound-mix is mixed well. The music is the only real positive I can give this movie. Because we have a couple of songs from Rob Zombie, and they were awesome. We also have music from Slipknot and Pink, and they were pretty good, too. So, I can say that music is the only thing that carries this movie.

So, with all this in mind, am I able to recommend "Rollerball"? If you can find this movie airing on TV somewhere, such as HBO, Showtime, or even FX. I'm not totally sure if this thing ever aired on FX, but I could be totally wrong there. If it's airing on any of these stations, or anywhere you can find this movie on TV, then go ahead and give it a watch. You might something more out of this thing than I did. But to purchase? No. This thing is definitely not worth purchasing. Even at it's $5 bargain bin range, it's not worth that kind of money. As I said, your best bet is to watch this thing on TV somewhere. So that way, you don't have to waste the $5 that I did when buying this turd. My god, this movie was fucking terrible. I kinda wanted to like this movie, even with it's dull premise, but unfortunately, it just wound up being a waste of an hour and 40 minutes. And now, I kinda want to watch something better. And seeing as how I mentioned Paul Heyman's acting in this movie, I kinda want to go and re-watch one of my older WWE PPV's I have on DVD. And I see my copy of "ECW's One Night Stand". I'm gonna go watch that and be reminded of when Paul Heyman, and WWE, were watchable.

Anyway, with that, guys, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all in the near future. Peace.

Reaction & Review | The Russian Ninja

 

Welcome, one and all, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, ladies and gentleman, I'm covering a Swedish action movie from 1989. That movie is "The Russian Ninja".

Now technically, this movie goes under two different titles. One of them is "The Russian Ninja", and the other is "Russian Terminator". But since the YouTube thumbnail shows the title of "The Russian Ninja", that's the name I'm gonna be sticking with. Plus also, and this is just a personal preference, I kinda like "The Russian Ninja" title, because it comes across as incredibly cheesy, yet sorta awesome.

Now, to give you guys a bit of a recap. Last month, I covered "The Ninja Mission". And to make a long story short, the movie was complete shit. It had no fucking plot to speak of, characters who were all shallow and lifeless, action scenes that were all samey up until the last half hour when it wanted to do something that was considered partially interesting. It was an, overall, pile of shit. So much so that I still believe that fans of plotless action movies would find it to be incredibly boring. I also mentioned that the movie had spawned a couple of supposed sequels. Tonight's movie being one of those supposed sequels. Now, why do I keep saying that they're supposed? Well, according to Mats Helge Olsson himself, he claimed these movies to be a sequel to "The Ninja Mission", because that movie was his one big hit. And it was. Because "The Ninja Mission" made millions in both the American and Asian markets. I wish I could give you some figures, but unfortunately, Wikipedia, or any other online source that I could find on this movie, doesn't have that kind of information. So while I can't give out any kind of figures, I can say that "The Ninja Mission" was Olsson's most successful movie. Now I don't know if there is any real connection with this movie being a 'sequel' to "The Ninja Mission", outside of the fact that it has something to do with ninjas. Or in this case, a Russian ninja. And before I get into this movie, I do know about the other supposed sequel to "The Ninja Mission" called "Eagle Island". I'm not even gonna bother with that movie, because this is the only 'sequel' I'm gonna be focusing on. Partially because of the awesome sounding title.

I really want this movie to be interesting. I want to note and say that I want this movie to be 'interesting'. Because after watching "The Ninja Mission", 'good' is the last thing that this movie is ever going to be. And if "The Ninja Mission" was Olsson's big hit, then I have almost no faith in this thing being halfway decent. But who knows? This movie could shock me and actually wind up being halfway decent. But the only way I'm gonna find out, is if I shut up, and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "The Russian Ninja".

2 minutes later

Well, guys, I can tell you one thing that this movie carried over from "The Ninja Mission". The laser sounding guns are back. And it's still irritating as shit to listen to. You would think within the 5 years between this movie and "The Ninja Mission", we would've gotten past the idea of using laser sounds for guns. But no. It's still here. And I fear that this movie may suck, guys.

1 minute later

OK...apparently, the original title of this movie is called "Ninja In Geheimer Mission 2: Russian Terminator". Even though the thumbnail on YouTube for this movie clearly says "The Russian Ninja". I don't know if that was a misleading fuck-up on the person who uploaded this movie, or if the people who made this movie didn't know what to even title this thing. Either keep it as "The Ninja Mission 2: Russian Terminator", because I'm going to assume that was the title that they were trying to reference. Or keep it as "The Russian Ninja", because that's the thumbnail I saw on YouTube. I understand it's a trivial thing to be bitching about, but it's those little details that kinda bother me slightly, you know?

15 minutes later

Did she seriously just described the ninja, that broke into their home, as a black commando? Because, you know, that's the first thing anyone would think of when they see someone garbed as a ninja. They think of them as "black commando's". I understand that's a trivial, and stupid, thing to even be mentioning, but that comment kinda threw me off slightly, you know?

7 minutes later

By the way, guys, do you know what else this movie carried over from "The Ninja Mission"? The acting is just as terrible as it was in the previous film. Scratch that. The acting is WORSE here than what was in "The Ninja Mission". That is just terrifying to witness, guys.

19 minutes later

So, guys, we're about halfway into this movie, so I'm gonna ask this. When the fuck is something interesting going to happen? Better yet, are we going to get a character that's worth caring for? I ask this, because since this movie has been crawling at a snail's pace, you would think that they would use that time to try and develop our characters. But no. This movie doesn't want to do that. And I fear that it's not going to do that anytime soon.

10 minutes later

So these two soldiers notice that the door was open, and one of them asks why it's open. Rather than reporting it as something suspicious because, you know, there might be a possible break in, they decide NOT to report it and just brush it off as nothing. Considering how easy it was for our heroes, including our ninja, to kill off a majority of these soldiers as if they were nothing, I think it's safe to assume that these retards are the most incompetent soldiers in the fucking world.

20 minutes later

Why the hell isn't this piece of shit finished yet? Seriously, guys, I cannot wait for this fucking thing to end. The movie has been so dull that I've been counting down the seconds until this thing is done. I can almost taste it.

The Review

Oh, thank you, God. This worthless pile of shit is done. Well, guys, that was "The Russian Ninja", or "Ninja In Geheimer Mission 2: Russian Terminator", according to this movie. I'm gonna shut this garbage off...OK.

I want to talk about the issue involving the movie's title first. Because, as I was watching the movie, I read the description of the user who uploaded this movie onto YouTube, and it says that the title of the movie is in German, because the version that I watched came from a German DVD. OK, I guess that does make some sense. Probably would've helped if this person was honest in giving out the actual title of the movie, or just call it "Russian Terminator", because that thumbnail I mentioned where it read "The Russian Ninja" is never brought up during the opening credits. But I guess just showing it's actual title in the thumbnail was too much of a challenge. Honestly though, all of that is just a minor complaint. And there's a lot more pressing issues that I need to get to.

Let's start with writing. The writing here is complete shit. In fact, I would almost say it's a rehash of the same plot that was used in "The Ninja Mission". Which is mind boggling, considering that "The Ninja Mission" had no fucking plot. The only difference here is that instead of an invention that was in the previous film, we have a document that is important to this shadowy organization that wants it, because there's a code there that they need. I couldn't tell you what it was for. They just say that it's incredibly important for them to get it. If I recall correctly, it was in regards to something involving relations between the East and the West. Which, in case you weren't aware, is exactly similar to what was in "The Ninja Mission". And instead of a scientist and his daughter that were kidnapped in the previous film, it's one of our leading female's boyfriend. And they use him as leverage to make his girlfriend get the document that they need. I almost thought that this movie was written by the same person who wrote "The Ninja Mission". But shockingly, it wasn't. The person wrote "The Ninja Mission" is a man by the name of Matthew Jacobs. The person who wrote this movie was Mats Helge Olsson. Who, not only wrote this movie but also directed both films. I'm almost convinced that when he finished making "The Ninja Mission", he decided to rehash the same fucking plot for this movie, and probably "Eagle Island", which, as I mentioned before, is ALSO a sequel to "The Ninja Mission". By the way, no, I am not wasting anymore time on his fucking supposed 'sequels'. Because this movie was bad enough, and, as I made mentioned before, if "The Ninja Mission" was considered his best film, then I don't think any sequel will do that movie any 'justice'. And I'm gonna use the word 'justice' in the loosest way possible, because that film sucked massive amounts of throbbing fat dick. So in case you couldn't tell, the writing is the exact same shit that was in "The Ninja Mission", except it's more lazily written here than what was in the previous film. Part of that has to do with the acting, which, believe me, I'll get to in a moment.

Now because we have a story that is clearly identical to "The Ninja Mission", let's get to the characters. And guess what? There are no fucking characters. Actually, no. We do have characters, except we don't have any characters with interesting personalities or any depth at all. We have our main character, Mark, who is a retired agent, I think. They never really specify if he's an agent or what, but that doesn't really matter. And he's only in the movie because of an extortion. Basically, his gun was found in Berlin, and his fingerprints are all over the gun. I would love to know the context behind that information, but considering that Mr. Olsson can't write for shit, I guess I shouldn't expect too much from him. So Mark ends up taking the mission because fuck you, bribe. And throughout half of the movie, he spends that amount of time following Eve and Phil, because they are after her father's document. And it's boring, because when he's not following them throughout half the movie, he's also a dull and boring character who, apparently, wins almost every fight, and has this dead-pan look on his face throughout the entire movie. Guys, if you thought the rant I had about Chuck Norris not expressing an emotion in "Lone Wolf McQuade" was bad. This movie is worse. Mark does not have any emotion on his face throughout the entire movie. Not once does he ever express any kind of emotion on his face. You never see him smile, be sad, angry, nothing. I don't know if that's how he was written, or if the actor doesn't know how to act. I'm going with the latter on that one, but again, I'll talk about acting when I get to it. But again, Mark's only in the movie because, once more, fuck you, bribe. Is there anything else about Mark that's worth noting? Well, he has a girlfriend or a wife that he meets up with in the beginning of the movie. Again, the movie doesn't really specify on that, so I guess it doesn't matter, because Mr. Olsson can't write characters. Speaking of which, we also have Eve, who is the daughter in which her boyfriend gets kidnapped. She has no fucking personality to speak of. She has a friend named Phil, who is also with her throughout the entire movie. And I know they're friends because, the movie clearly states 3 or 4 different times that they were best friends since childhood. Because the viewers wouldn't have been able to take into account that Eve and Phil are best friends, because the movie has to tell them this multiple times over. Does Phil have any personality? Hell no, he doesn't. He's only there to do whatever Eve wants him to do because friendship. There's also Eve's boyfriend, who, not only has no personality, but he ends up being forgotten by the end of the movie. Because the last time we see him in this movie is towards the very end, where he ends up trying to escape, only for one of our villains to retie him back to a chair that he was secured to. And right before the closing credits, Eve's father tells Mark that his people will eventually find the place where he's tied up and free him. Never mind the fact that we don't ever get to see him rescued by any of our main characters. No, we'll just let him be rescued by some people that work for Eve's father because fuck you, that's why.

So not only have we established that Mr. Olsson doesn't know how to write an interesting story or characters with any level of personality, the man also doesn't know how to write tension. Let's talk about that Russian Ninja, shall we? First of all, even though the title of this movie has the "Russian Terminator" name, he never gets called by that in this movie. He actually does get called the Russian Ninja. Which leads me to even more questions as to why they couldn't just call this movie "The Russian Ninja", as per the title on YouTube, and not "Russian Terminator". But again, that is a minor thing, and I'm gonna try to move on from that. Now the reason why there is no tension in this movie has to do with the identity of the Russian Ninja. We are told by our villains in one scene, where they hear about these legends of the Russian Ninja, and how he has fans from America and Russia, and they wonder if they'll ever meet him. And the movie tries to build this up as if it's some big plot twist. It's not. Why? Well, this movie, and I am not kidding when I say this, telegraphs who our Russian Ninja is almost 10 minutes into the movie. So, when Eve's father leaves in his car, we get to see a shot of some dude who stares at Mark from a distance, and the camera seems to be focusing on the few shots that we see him stare at our main character. I should mention that Mark never sees him, which is a bit strange, but oh well. And I could tell you that he was the Russian Ninja because of the constant camera shots we see of him, as if the movie was blatantly telling you that this dude was going to play an important part of the movie. And I'm gonna give you a spoiler here, in case the movie thinks you're stupid. He ends up being the Russian Ninja...ta-da. I understand that I may have given away an 'important' plot point, but because there was no tension, and the movie telegraphed it so poorly, it just ends up being wasted. I haven't seen telegraphing done this badly since I watched "Tourist Trap". Granted, the telegraphing in this movie is not as bad as it was in "Tourist Trap", but it sure as hell comes close.

So, I guess the best way to summarize the writing is that it's complete shit. And even for a plotless action movie, it's really poorly written, too. Now, let's get to the acting. Oh boy...the acting. Well, as I have made mention earlier, Mark has no expression on his face throughout the entire movie. And part of the reason why that is was because since this script was so terrible, that the actor who played Mark didn't even try in this movie. In fact, that's what I got from just about every actor in this movie. Nobody put in any effort. And I honestly believe it's because none of these people know how to act. Some of them, such as Mark, didn't fucking care. Or you have lines that are poorly dubbed in, such as with the Russian Ninja. And yes, his lines were terribly dubbed in. So much so, that I felt the actor dubbing his lines was trying to ham up his performance. But you see, it has to be natural if you are trying to ham up your lines. When you're doing that intentionally, it makes your acting sound like shit. And that's what happened with our Russian Ninja's voice actor. But, by far, the worst actor in this movie goes to whoever played Eve. Holy shit, she is fucking horrendous in this movie. Not only does she not know how to emote, much like most of the other actors in this movie, but she does not belong anywhere near a film set. She does not feel comfortable on camera, and every time she tries to express an emotion of anger, it sounds fucking terrible. When she first talks with our villainess, who, as far as I know, does not even have a name, so I guess I can add that to more things that Mr. Olsson can't write. But anyway, when she's talking with our villainess on the phone, Eve, on two occasions, says "You bastard!". And both attempts at it sound fucking weak as shit, that it actually makes this movie painful to sit through. Well, that can go for the entire cast, but Eve stands out the most, because this actress cannot act at all. As I said, not only is she not comfortable on camera, but she should stay far, far away from a film set as humanly possible. She was just awful.

Not only does our cast not know how to act, but half of the time, they don't even know how to feel pain. And this is where the fight choreography comes in. First of all, I can tell you that the fight choreography in this movie is fucking garbage. And I can attest to this by our very first fight between Mark and the Russian Ninja. Most of the fight ends up with Mark getting his ass kicked. And it would've been more believable if the actor playing Mark knew how to feel pain. Because when our Russian Ninja has to either punch or kick him, Mark has the exact same face that he has throughout the entire movie. Even when he gets knocked down, Mark's expression does not change. Which leads to me to believe either it was due to his shitty acting, or the fight choreography was so piss poor, that the person who was in charge of it hasn't seen a fight in his god damn life. And none of these fight scenes end up getting better. Now granted, we don't have the excessive gun fights that were in "The Ninja Mission". But honestly, I would rather have that again if I didn't know the fight choreography in this movie was this bad. And mind you, the gun fights were boring as shit in "The Ninja Mission", but at least you had one interesting action scene towards the end that kinda ended up working. Here though, there is nothing in terms of the fight choreography that makes it stand out. And I can't believe I would ever say this, but the action scenes in "The Ninja Mission", what few there were, are better there than what was in "The Russian Ninja". That is a fucking feat, in and of itself. And this movie should have no excuse for having fight scenes this poorly executed.

There isn't really a whole lot here, in terms of special effects. We do have blood here. Granted, it's not as much as was shown in "The Ninja Mission", but it's still here, and it looks OK. It's nothing great, but I can't really call it bad. Our squib work involving guns is pretty good. Although, I did notice something odd, and maybe it's just me, but during the latter scene where our heroes are storming a mansion, Mark's shotgun looks as though it's shooting fireworks. I'm not totally sure why it looks like that, but I did notice it, and it just seemed a little bit odd to me. Maybe it's just something that I never knew about shotguns back in 1989, where they could shoot fireworks. But it was just something I noticed, and most people aren't going to notice it, or even care about it, so take it for what you will.

Camerawork here is pretty good, the lighting is decent, our sound-mix is mixed pretty well. I actually will give this movie one thing when it comes to sound. I talked about the laser sounding guns, and how they made a return in this movie. And I figured that's what this movie was going to be focusing on during the action scenes. Well shockingly, the moment that I brought that up, the movie decided to stop using them. I might've heard it one other time during the final portion of the movie, but it was such a trivial moment, that I ended up forgetting it ever happened. And I can give this movie that much. The laser sounding guns are not as excessive as they were in "The Ninja Mission". Music, for the most part, is decent, save for one track. There's this one track involving drums, and I swear, you will hear this track play about two or three different times throughout the entire movie. And it got annoying really quick with how long that track played. Other than that, I can say the music here is decent.

So, when all said is done, can I recommend "The Russian Ninja"? No. Fuck no. This movie is fucking awful. It is one of...no, this is, by far, the WORST action movie I have ever seen. I cannot recommend it under any circumstance. And yes, you can watch this movie on YouTube for free. Do not waste your time on this movie. It is an hour and 27 minutes that you will never get back. I thought I hit the lowest ground when watching "The Ninja Mission". But, holy shit, did this movie dig under that ground and it kept going further down the shit hole. I knew, going into this movie, that it was going to be bad. But I didn't expect it to be this fucking terrible. The only bright spot out of this movie is that I don't ever have to watch it again. And now, I have to find something better to watch. I'm scanning my DVD collection for something better. And the first thing I see is "Bloodsport". I'm gonna re-watch my copy of "Bloodsport", because it had better writing, better acting, and much better fight choreography than this worthless turd. So I'm gonna do that, and hopefully, get this piece of shit movie out of my mind.

Anyway, with that, guys, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all in the near future. Peace.

Reaction & Review | Dead Man's Burden

Welcome, one and all, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, ladies and gentleman, I'm taking a look at a Western drama from 2012. That movie is "Dead Man's Burden".

Now, as has been established back in my review of "McQ", I am a huge fan of Westerns. Most of them starring John Wayne or Clint Eastwood. Because Westerns have been a huge part of my childhood. I've grown up watching a lot of classic Westerns, and I still enjoy watching those movies to this day, because they are just that memorable.

But the thing is that, while I have seen a lot of classic Westerns, I never really watched a lot of modern Westerns. Now this could attributed to the fact that Westerns sorta fizzled out of popularity in the late 70's to early 80's. Now that isn't to say that there weren't Westerns being made after the genre had lost it's popularity. After all, I remember films such as "Pale Rider", "Tombstone", and "Django Unchained", and they were all great films. Well, I can say "Pale Rider" and "Django Unchained" were great films. I haven't seen "Tombstone", but I've heard nothing except good things about that movie. My point is, I haven't really seen a ton of modern Western films. The only two that come to mind are "Django Unchained" and "Cowboys vs. Aliens". The latter being a pretty good movie, if just a little bit flawed.

Now, as for "Dead Man's Burden", I came across this movie on YouTube from a channel called Grjngo. And no, I'm not misspelling that name. That is how it's spelled on their YouTube channel. And Grjngo's channel is, basically, dedicated to showing Western movies. A lot of them I have never heard of, and most of them are classic Westerns. Now, I'm not going to review every single one of them, but there are some that have peeked my interest, so I'll save them for another time. Now, I wanted to find a modern Western that was worth covering for this series, and this was the only one I could find on Grjngo's channel that was worth covering. And the only thing I can tell you about this movie is that it's a Western from 2012. And the plot, from what I could gather, is about two siblings that reunite together after the death of their father, and a mining company wants to buyout their land.

Now that plot may not sound interesting, but I am hoping that the movie will be able to take this basic plot, and work it to it's advantage. But I don't really know if this movie will be any good. The only way I'm gonna find out, is if I shut up, and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "Dead Man's Burden".

14 minutes later

You know, guys, if it were me, personally, I wouldn't invite someone, who is trying to buyout my land, to attend my father's funeral. It just seems kind of fucked up, especially knowing that this guy is still wanting to buy the McCurry's land. I totally understand that it's a trivial thing to be bringing up, but still, it just seems kind of messed up to me.

20 minutes later

Sorry, guys, for not saying a whole right now. I'm just getting sucked into the story. I'm digging it so far, and I hope it continues to stay that way.

15 minutes later

Sure...nobody killed your Pa, except the horse that he was, supposedly, thrown off on. You know, guys, this movie has been really good so far,  but this excuse that Martha's been using to try and, possibly, cover up on how her Pa was killed is getting a little bit old.

20 minutes later

Once more, guys, I'm gonna have to apologize for not saying a whole lot, but this story has been so good, that I've been too busy focusing on what's going on with the story and seeing where it goes next. It honesty has been really good, so far.

The Review

Well, guys, that was "Dead Man's Burden". Let me shut the movie off...OK. Oh boy...out of all the ways that this movie could've ended...this was the one ending I was not hoping for. I am a little disappointed by the ending, but I'm not gonna let that ruin this movie for me. Let's talk about "Dead Man's Burden". And the best way to do this is by talking about the writing.

Throughout my lifetime in watching Westerns, one thing that I've noticed in a lot of them is that they, usually, have a much slower paced story. Now, in most cases, I don't mind that. Because, as I made mentioned before, I've grown up watching Westerns as a child. So I'm use to watching them, and not caring that they have a much slower pace when it comes to the writing. Not all of them are like this, of course, but, to me, I notice that in a lot of the Westerns that I grew up watching. Some of it has to do with the runtime. And two big examples I can think of are "Django Unchained", and "The Good, The Bad and The Ugly". "Django Unchained", mainly because Quentin Tarantino's movies usually have a habit of almost reaching the 3 hour mark, with the one lone exception being "Death Proof". As with "The Good, The Bad and the Ugly", it really has to do with how that movie was released on DVD and Blu-ray. Now, I want to make a clear mention that I love "The Good, The Bad and the Ugly", and I always will. But when it was released on DVD and Blu-ray, they added in a lot of extra content that really did not enhance the film in any way. Because there were extra scenes in that movie that really went nowhere. Added on to the fact that most of the scenes were dubbed in, and rather poorly, too. And all of those extra scenes almost pushed the film to it's 3 hour mark. And what's funny about it is that you would not notice these extra scenes if you were watching the movie on VHS. Now that, in part, has to do with the limitations set by the standards for VHS's back in the day. But the other reason why that worked better on VHS is because, without the extra scenes, the pacing on that movie was just right. However, with the extra scenes that are on DVD, Blu-ray, and probably the version of it on YouTube, it brings the pacing of that movie down, slightly. Mind you, it doesn't ruin the movie. But as I said, it wasn't really needed, and the movie could've either done without the extra scenes, or leave it as an option in where you can watch the movie with either the original 2 hour and 41 minute version that was on VHS, or watch it with the, almost, 3 hour version.

Now, the reason why I brought up those two examples is because pacing is a rather crucial thing, when it comes to making your movie. And while I will say that "Dead Man's Burden" has some really strong pacing throughout most of it's 92 minute runtime, it does have some moments where the film kinda drags at some points. For example, we have Wade McCurry, one of our main characters, who after getting shot, is slowly crawling towards a cactus. And after we see him biting into one of the pieces of cacti he cut off, the scene immediately cuts to a different scene, and we NEVER get to see what Wade was trying to do after that. It felt like the movie needed to pad itself out so that we could get the movie to go on longer by having a scene, or two, not go anywhere with what it was trying to do. Now, as I was doing the scant bit of research I could find on this movie, I found out that this movie was filmed within 18 days on a limited budget. And I can tell you that it shows, because it really felt like the people who worked on this movie wanted to do more with this thing. However, because of a strict time limit, they weren't able to do more with this movie. Now, I'm not gonna blame the budget, because I have seen a ton of movies, some for this series and on my own time, that had low budgets and were still able to make a pretty good movie. Some of them even great. And this movie is definitely really good, considering what it had to work with. And, as I said, while the movie has some slight pacing issues, it's not enough to where you will get bored by it, unless if you're not into Westerns. But I'll touch a little more on that when I talk about recommendations.

As for the story itself, it is a mostly well written story about two settlers, Martha and Heck, trying to get through life in New Mexico. Martha's relatives, such as most of her brothers, including her mother and father, are all dead in some way, shape, or form. Her brother, Wade McCurry, who was fighting in the Civil War, receives a letter one day, and it's from Martha's father. He comes back home and learns that Martha has been trying to sell her homeland to a mining company, because they just can't make it out here in New Mexico. They, that being Martha and Heck, are trying to start a new life in San Francisco so that they can open their own hotel. And they're hoping that Mr. Lane, who I guess is the head of the mining company, the movie doesn't exactly explain that part, will try and buyout their land for a reasonable price. Now, I may have given it away during the reaction portion where the circumstances of how Martha's father died are uncertain. And the movie decides to play itself as a mystery so that Wade tries to figure out how their father died, while also trying to stop Martha from selling her homeland. And the story is going to keep you engaged as you learn more about the inconsistencies with how Martha's father died and how Wade comes to the conclusion of what really happened to him. Now, this story works because our characters are, mostly, likable, and have a ton of depth. There is one, however, I need to talk about, which would be the character of Heck. And I'm gonna have to give a little bit of a spoiler in order for me to talk about this. So, before Heck ends up killing Mr. Lane, Mr. Lane goes into detail about who Heck really is, and all of the terrible deeds that he's done such as burning Lawrence, Kansas to the ground, or killing women and children, or killing a deputy sheriff of, I believe, Missouri, because he loves violence. And all of that would've been fine, except we're told all of this, but we don't get any kind of flashbacks to where we would see what Mr. Lane was talking about. And all of this backstory comes right out of nowhere, because, for the most part, Heck mostly comes off as just a family man who is trying to help Martha trying to get through everyday life at their home. At least, until we get to a plot point where Heck tries to stop Wade from getting Mr. Lane to a judge, because Wade thinks Mr. Lane was the one who killed his father. And when Heck does show his true colors, it kinda comes across as a bit rushed. Because there's not much of a hint to show Heck as this really bad guy. The only kind of hint we do get is when Wade tells Martha that anyone who carries the sorta gun that Heck carries usually has some sort of story to tell. But that's not really much of a hint, because as I said, when Heck does show he is this bad guy, it comes across as kind of rushed. Now, you could say that because the film only had 18 days to work with, the writers didn't have enough time to properly explain this kind of heel turn. And while that may be true, to an extent, I still think the movie could've handled it a little better, even with the limited time that the movie had.

But barring that, the story here is still really solid...minus the last 20 minutes, or so, where the film slowly kinda fell apart. And that mainly has to do with the sudden heel turn involving Heck. At least, to me, it felt sudden. But even with that, the movie is still really strong, even with the setbacks that this film had. What also makes this movie stand out is the acting. Out of all the movies I watched where it had worked with low budgets, this is, quite possibly, one of the best. The acting is fantastic from everyone. There is nobody here that phoned it in. And even with Heck's sudden heel turn, his actor was still able to turn in a really great showing. I really liked everyone's performances in this movie. And another thing I found out about this movie is that when it was bring written, the writer and director for this movie, which was Jared Moshe, didn't want to use big name actors, because he thought that they didn't belong in that time period. And while I could totally see the logic behind that reasoning, I do think it is sort of flimsy. I say that because, since this movie was filmed with a tight budget, I don't think that they could even afford a big name actor, even if they wanted to. But still, I'll take a flimsy reasoning over nothing. Overall, guys, the acting is amazing, and it really is one of the biggest highlights of this movie.

Our costuming is done perfectly. Everyone feels like they came out of the 1800's, so, of course, you would need to get the right kind of outfits for our cast, so that they would feel like they belonged in this time period. Which, thinking about it now, I guess it does make more sense as to why there are no big name actors in this movie, because I couldn't imagine anyone in particular who would fit in the 1800's. I still think it's because of it's low budget, but I'm not going to dwell on that any longer. There really isn't a whole lot here for special effects, outside of gun wounds, including one moment where Heck is holding the ripped out heart of Mr. Lane. The effect for it looked rather dirty, and I don't mean that because it came from a human body, I mean it looked dirty because there was a ton of dark dirt on it. Which looked rather fake, even for the standards of a low budget film, but I'm not going to harp on that too much. So I can say that special effects are decent here.

Our camerawork is really solid. Lighting is done incredibly well, mainly because, most of this movie was filmed outdoors during the daylight, so it would make sense for the lighting to be mostly solid. I say mostly, because there is one shot that looked rather poor. And it was during the beginning of the movie, where the camera is focusing on a lower angle of Martha reloading her shotgun, and she's standing right behind the sun. So as she's reloading her gun, the sun's glare will pop in about several times during the shot and it does come off as a little bit distracting. Perhaps they could've focused the camera at a different angle, or have the actress stand at a different position, where the sun's glare doesn't become an issue when you're filming your shot. Outside of that, though, the lighting in this movie is great. Our score here is decent. Our sound-mix, however...is actually going to be one of the deciding factors of this movie. You see, when I started watching the movie, I could barely hear the dialogue from our characters. So much so, that I had to turn on the captions, just so I can read what the characters were saying, because there are moments where the dialogue sounded quiet, so I had to replay some parts of it with the captions turned on. Now, I don't know if it was a technical issue on my end, or if it was the version I watched on YouTube. Either way, at some points, I could barely hear what the characters were saying. In fact, even with the captions turned on, there some moments where the subtitles will translate certain bits of dialogue as inaudible. Again, I don't know why that is. Mind you, it doesn't ruin the movie, because it does read out what the characters are saying throughout most of the movie. However, there are some moments where certain lines of dialogue will read out as inaudible, and it also comes off as rather noticeable. So I do have to warn you there that if you're going to watch this movie, I would, personally, recommend watching it with the captions on. But that's just me. And admittedly, I was able to hear more of the character's dialogue as the movie continued on. But just for the hell of it, I kept the captions on, just in case those problems popped up.

Overall, guys, am I able to recommend "Dead Man's Burden"? Yes, provided you are into Westerns, and you're able to look over some of the schizophrenic dialogue, if you watch this movie with the captions on. This movie is really good. Mind you, this is not going to rank up as one of the best Westerns I've ever seen. Hell no. It's never going to reach those standards. But it's still certainly a really fascinating movie. Again, provided if you're into Westerns. If you're not a fan of Westerns, then there's no way I could recommend this movie. However, if you do want to watch this thing, it is on YouTube, so you can go right ahead and watch it without having to buy the movie on DVD. And if you really enjoy it, you could wind up buying this thing on DVD somewhere. I'm not totally sure if it's something I would buy on DVD myself, but I did enjoy watching this thing once, and that's always a positive. And now, I'm in the mood to watch another Western. I'm looking over my DVD shelf and I see my copy of "El Dorado". I'm gonna go watch that, because it's been a little while since I last watched it.

Anyway, guys, with that, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all in the near future. Peace.