Reaction & Review | Day of the Warrior

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, guys, I'm taking a look at the 11th entry in the "Triple B" series, which came out in 1996. That movie is "Day of the Warrior".

Now this movie, I do know, has Andy Sidaris back writing and directing this movie after his son fumbled with the previous film in this series, which was "The Dallas Connection". And if you hadn't read my review of that movie yet, to give you a short summary, the movie really kinda sucked. It had all of the ingredients in a regular Andy Sidaris flick, but it lacked a lot of the charm and interest that Andy Sidaris usually puts in his movies.

So with Andy Sidaris back in the director's chair for this one, I'm hoping that he'll be able to rebound after his son's disappointing showing. Granted, I probably shouldn't be too harsh on his son, but honestly, after watching "The Dallas Connection", I'm already happy that Andy Sidaris took over for the next two films. And like I said, I'm hoping for this one to at least be entertaining enough for me to consider worth watching. Mind you, I haven't really heard good things about this movie, but as I said back in my review of "The Dallas Connection", none of these movies are actually "good", they're just cheesy action films that feature what you would expect from Andy Sidaris. And I really only care if they're entertaining. So long as this one is entertaining in a so bad it's good kind of way, then I'm not asking for much else here.

So anyway, I'm hoping this one will be really entertaining in it's own way. But the only way I'm gonna find out if it is entertaining at all is if I shut up and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "Day of the Warrior".

9 minutes later

Well, guys, so far, I can't really say much about the story itself yet, but I will say that gun that our main character was using looks awesome. I really want that gun.

6 minutes later

So, I'm going to assume that this is suppose to be the head honcho of our villains this time, Warrior. And the guy who's playing him is Buff Bagwell. Yes, guys, former WCW wrestler Buff Bagwell is playing the main villain of this movie. That's actually really cool! I'm hoping that I get to see more of him in this movie.

10 minutes later

You guys can't hear this for obvious reasons, but this rock song here is actually sorta catchy. Well, at least, I'm enjoying this song anyway. So, I can at least say the music here is a positive, so far at least.

5 minutes later

So the Elvis Impersonator on stage is, not only one of the side villains from "The Dallas Connection", but his stage name is called "Elvis Fu". Oh god...that name is really fucking stupid. Granted, it's sorta funny, but why the hell did he choose that name of all things?! Just...why?

3 minutes later

So, I've gotten a little bit more backstory for Warrior here. And I'll say this on the record, he's probably one of the most developed villains in the entire "Triple B" series. I want you to process that for a moment. Our villain, Buff Bagwell, who's also a professional wrestler in this movie, has the most development in an Andy Sidaris film, which is mainly about women showing their boobs and overly ridiculous action scenes. I'm...just speechless, guys, just...wow.

15 minutes later

Well, guys, I think somebody might've taken some inspiration from Rambo by shooting a crossbow-looking gun and having the arrow explode afterwards. But what's interesting about the gun is, well, as I just stated, it looks like a pistol with the smaller length-size of a crossbow. Why the fuck anyone would make a gun like that makes zero sense, but I'm gonna say that at least it looks stupid, in a really funny way. Just thought I'd share that with you guys.

11 minutes later

So, guys, I just saw posters featuring films from previous Andy Sidaris flicks like "Do or Die" and "Savage Beach". There was one other, but I couldn't quite make out which one that was. Still though, it was a nice cameo to see there.

The Review

Well, guys, that was "Day of the Warrior". Let me go ahead and shut the movie off here...OK. Before I delve right into this movie, I'm first gonna get this question out of the way. How does this film compare to the other films in the "Triple B" series? Well, it still isn't good, but I will say, when compared to something like "Hard Hunted" and "The Dallas Connection", it's certainly a huge step above those movies. And as for it's own standards, well, I would say that it's just OK. I can't really rank any of these because I don't really do "tier" lists that people take incredibly seriously, but if I were forced to do that with this one, it would be somewhere hanging out in the middle. But still, it's a very entertaining film that I still enjoyed, even if it did go slightly overboard at times.

Let's start with the writing. Now, in case you hadn't read my review for "The Dallas Connection", I talked about the different styles between how Andy Sidaris writes for his movies, and how his son, Drew Sidaris, writes for his movies. With Drew's movies, it seemed like he just took ingredients from his father's previous works and just stitched it together into some mishmash of a half-assed plot, along with things that were done in previous Andy Sidaris films, only he didn't do it in an interesting way. And without go too much into detail, because I've already written a review for it that you can read for yourself, it just made Drew's movies look a lot weaker, when compared to his father's work. Now that's not to say that Andy himself had his fare share of weak movies, but in terms of what I watched from Drew's two movies, I can hardly see myself ever watching his movies again. Maybe I could give "Enemy Gold" another watch, because that was at least partially decent, but "The Dallas Connection" is where I had to put my foot down and say that it completely sucked so much that I genuinely believe it to be the worst movie out of the entire "Triple B" series.

Now with this movie, it's very similar to what Andy Sidaris did with "Fit To Kill" after he kinda fumbled with "Hard Hunted". Basically, this movie is what I would call a "back to basics" sort of film. Where he took what worked in his previous movies, and used his magic to make this film stand out in his own charming way. This movie has everything you could ask for from him. Women showing off their big boobs, over-the-top action scenes, and a lot of T&A. And while, admittedly, this movie doesn't do it as cool as the previous entries did, there is still a couple of moments where the action scenes do shine. Such as near the very end where one of our heroines uses a walking cane to blow up and kill one of the bad guys in an over-the-top fashion. It's out of nowhere and very hilarious, which is another thing I can grant this movie is that the humor is definitely really funny at times. Granted, not every joke here is going to land, but what is here for humor still works in it's own way.

Now as for the plot, well, the only things that I could pick up from it is that a former CIA Agent, AKA Warrior/Buff Bagwell, turns heel and steals a computer database, which has information on all of our agents, who are now in danger of being killed. And it's also here where I can say that Buff Bagwell's character is the most developed out of every character in this series. Because, aside from his status as CIA Agent, he's also a pro wrestler and is also part Native American on his mother's side, which is why you see him dressed up with an Indian's big feather wig as part of his wrestling attire. Honestly, the first time I saw Buff Bagwell wearing that outfit, part of me pictured Tatanka, an actual Native American wrestler from the WWF days, in that role. Now granted, I don't know if they could've made that work or not. But still, what is here for Buff Bagwell's character still works. However, I'll get into all that later when I covering acting.

Speaking of characters, that actually is one of the big problems with this movie. And it's not just that a lot of the characters are bland, but moreover, there are just too many characters in this movie to follow. To give you guys an example, in the beginning of the movie, we follow blonde-haired male agent by the name of Doc Austin infiltrating an enemy unit's camp that's working for Warrior. One of the villains of the movie is named Manuel, who is also the same actor who played the previous two villains in "Enemy Gold" and "The Dallas Connection". I'm going to assume that they couldn't hire anybody else to star in these movies due to budget concerns or contractual obligations. I don't know which is the correct answer, but regardless, we have him and some blonde girl I've never seen before.

Next, we have Cobra, who was also the same blonde-haired lady from "The Dallas Connection". And she's in a lot of scenes that probably could've been trimmed down, because some of them are just tracking shots of where she's going next. She's also one of the agents that's being hunted down. Then you have another male agent by the name of Tyler, who also has another girl with her who's name that I don't remember. Then you have Julie Strain back in this movie, only this time, she's playing one of the protagonists by the name of "Willow Black". Yeah, seriously, she went from "Black Widow" in "The Dallas Connection" to "Willow Black" in "Day of the Warrior". Very creative naming, I know. But anyway, she's in this movie. And also, the Asian dude who got killed in "The Dallas Connection" is in this movie too, and he also has a gig where he becomes an Elvis Impersonator performing in Vegas. And while his stage name "Elvis Fu" is incredibly stupid, he honestly is one of the only other characters in this movie that I can remember who stood out to me.

But you see where I'm going at here, right? There are just too many characters in this movie to follow, and there's probably a couple of more that I forgot about because there really is a lot to follow and keep track of here. And what sorta hampers this is the pacing of the movie. The film's only about 96 minutes long, and while I don't think the pacing here is as terrible as it was in "The Dallas Connection", I admit that it does go on for about 10 minutes too long. Like I mentioned earlier involving the scenes with Cobra, I do believe that they could've trimmed a couple of scenes involving the tracking shots and it could've flowed a little better.

So anyway, the writing here, plotwise, is really nothing you're gonna care about. The only thing most fans care about is what you would come to expect from an Andy Sidaris film. And all of that is, thankfully, here. Especially after the disappointing run of films that came from Drew Sidaris, this is a nice welcome back to basics for Andy Sidaris. And as for the acting, well, much like with a lot of these movies, the acting here is mostly terrible. Most of the acting here sounds stilted and wooden. And even though you have returning actors like Julie Strain, Julie K. Cobra, and Rodrigo Obregon in this movie, most of them still put on wooden performances like they did in the previous movies. The only two standouts I can give is the Asian guy playing "Elvis Fu" and Buff Bagwell, the latter who is just hamming it up whenever he's in the ring. And I don't just mean when he was performing on WCW, I mean his actual role in the movie. Mind you, he's not as bad as he could be here, but it's still laughably bad, which still makes it stand out in a positive way. But overall, guys, the acting here is pretty much the standard terribleness you come to expect from an Andy Sidaris movie.

Special effects are also the same kind of thing from just about every film in this "Triple B series". Pyrotechnics, squibwork for guns, and what little blood effects are just there, really. Costuming here is pretty good, although I'm mainly just saying that for Buff Bagwell's wrestling attire. Then again, as a pro wrestling fan, I take more attention to those whenever I see a wrestler's costume or attire that stands out to me. But anyway, costuming here is pretty good, at least when it comes to Buff Bagwell.

Camerawork here is good. Lighting here is great. Sound-mixing is also good. Music here is definitely a positive, as there is quite a bit of music in this movie, and the songs here are actually sorta catchy. The one song, though, that kinda got to me in slight annoyance is this one piano track that I swear they loop a *lot* here. I can't quite count how many times I've heard it, but it did start to sound a little grating after a while. But other than that, the score and soundtrack here is mostly really good.

Ultimately, guys, when all is said and done, am I able to recommend "Day of the Warrior". Yes, I actually can. Provided, of course, you're into these movies to begin with. And also, if you're someone like me who was disappointed by Drew Sidaris's last couple of films and you want to see a return to form from Andy Sidaris, then yeah, this movie is definitely going to provide that for you. And I'm happy to say that, again, I really did enjoy this movie. Not quite as much as the previous films that he did, but it is still entertaining in it's own right. So yeah, guys, I can recommend "Day of the Warrior" to you all. Which now only leaves one more movie to go in this series. And, my god, I can't believe we're about to reach that cornerstone. But that's not gonna be until next week. I actually have a couple of more movies to go first, one in which includes my "Christmas In July Special". I won't spoil what it is, but if you're curious about it, then stay tuned, because that'll be coming up very soon. Until then, though, I'm gonna go and watch something else. Well, I've been watching a lot action films lately, so I think I need to switch it up a bit and watch something different. I think I'm gonna go and watch something like "The Cat Returns". Why not? It's sorta random, but I haven't seen a Studio Ghibli film in quite a while, and "The Cat Returns" is certainly one of my top favorites from them. So I'll go and do that next as soon as this review gets put up.

And with that, guys, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all later. Peace.

Reaction & Review | The Secret Agent Club

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, guys, we're continuing a tradition that I have been doing for the last several years for this series, which is me covering a movie starring Hulk Hogan in July. And it's kinda fitting, since this is around the same that he unfortunately passed away just last year. So, I think it's more imperative that I keep going with this tradition. And as for tonight's movie, well, it's a comedy that came out in 1996. That movie is "The Secret Agent Club".

Now, I'd love to tell you guys anything that I know about this movie, but sadly, I really don't know anything about it. All I know is that it stars Hulk Hogan in another comedy. In fact, those are really the only genre of films that he's, at least, competent at: Comedies and action films. Mind you, I wouldn't say that the ones that I've seen are exactly "good", but I did really enjoy "Suburban Commando", which was rather decent, as goofy as it was. And while a lot of his films, so far, have been rather hit or miss for me, I'm still enjoying the opportunity to give these movies a chance.

Beyond that, I really know nothing about the plot to this thing. I'm gonna assume that it's suppose to be a family comedy, which can really go either way here. I'm hoping that this one is at least decent. I'm not expecting it to be good, but it could still be on the decent side of thing, or perhaps even reach the cheesiness factor of "Suburban Commando". I don't really know. The only way I'm gonna know if this thing is even watchable at all is if I shut up and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "The Secret Agent Club".

2 minutes later

OK, guys, the film's just started and I already have a bit of a complaint. You guys can't hear this for obvious reasons, but for some reason, the music keeps getting cut off at random times. Now I don't know if that's just the version that I'm watching off YouTube right now, or if that was also an issue on the home video releases as well. Either way, it's a little bit distracting at the moment. I'm hoping that's not gonna be an issue later on, but we'll just have to wait and see.

6 minutes later

Wait, so Hogan just grabbed the laser gun that was being protected by security lasers. And even though his own arm was clearly being touched by the security lasers, nothing actually happened and he's already escaping. Unless those lasers give out silent alarms, then the people who were protecting this gun have incredibly shit security systems. Either way, I'm actually kinda shocked he's getting away with it that easily.

17 minutes later

OK, I didn't think using an inflatable blow-up would actually help you in getting down from a building like that. That was actually kind of impressive.

6 minutes later

So this Japanese kid walks into the toy store, and upon discovering the other kids there, he also discovers his father buried underneath the shelf of toys and assumes that he's already dead. How do you know he's actually dead, though? For all we know, he could be totally unconscious. I just think this kid is jumping to conclusions already. Just saying.

6 minutes later

Hold up! So Chase's car was impounded at the police impound lot. Yet, when Jeremy and his friends are trapped in his car, Jeremy notices the keys are still in the ignition! And yeah, he uses it to start up the car so that they can get away from Wrecks. Why the fuck would anyone leave the keys inside the ignition at an impound lot makes no fucking sense whatsoever!

14 minutes later

Wait, so Rosalie is comparing Jeremy's Dad's secret identity to Clark Kent and Lois Lane, in which he never revealed his secret identity to her because the bad guys would use her as bait to get to him. Except, he actually *did* reveal his identity to her in, I believe, "Superman II". And mind you, that movie came out in 1980. This movie came out 16 years after that. Now either this girl never saw "Superman II", or the writers of this movie seemed to think that Clark Kent would never reveal his identity to anyone he cared about, including Lois Lane. Granted, I understand it's a very trivial and stupid thing to be bitching about, but my inner nerd just needed to comment on that very stupid comparison of hers.

18 minutes later

OK, I've been meaning to ask this for a while now, and seeing as how there's only about 17 minutes left to go in this movie, I may as well ask it now. Is there a reason why Wrecks has a mechanical leg? I know it probably has nothing to do with the movie itself, but I feel like that's something they could still explain, assuming they actually do explain that within the short amount of time left on this movie. I don't think they will, but I still would like to know something about it is all.

The Review

Well, guys, that was "The Secret Agent Club". Let me go ahead and shut the movie off here...OK. Well, I'm gonna say this much. As stupid and as corny as this film is, I actually kinda enjoyed it. Mind you, since I watched it off YouTube, I'm kinda thankful that I don't own a physical copy of it. Because, even though I did sorta enjoy watching this film, I would not keep it for my DVD collection. I just don't think it would be worth holding onto, unless I bought it for really cheap. And even then, I don't think it would even be worth that much.

So anyway, let's just go ahead and start this review off proper here by first discussing the writing. The writing here is really kinda stupid. Now, to be fair, a lot of Hulk Hogan's movies are incredibly stupid and nonsensical. This one is really no exception either, however, I feel this one kinda cranks up it's stupidity by a wee bit. Most of that involves these kids, whom we mostly follow throughout the entire movie. And even though this film does star Hulk Hogan, he really doesn't have a whole lot of screen time here, nor does he have many lines to work with. Which is both a good and bad thing, however, I'll get into all that later when I cover acting. But yeah, we mostly follow these kids, including Chase's son, Jeremy, who all get together to try and find his Dad, after he was apprehended by the bad guys. Bad guys, who I should mention are all incompetent as shit.

In fact, let's actually start with the biggest problem this movie has, when it comes to it's villains. Like I just said, they're all incompetent and stupid as shit. Wrecks is the muscle-head of the group. And on multiple occasions, he's outwitted by the kids on almost every turn. And also, I asked a little earlier if they were ever going to explain why he has a mechanical leg, and they clearly don't. I figured they wouldn't, seeing as how the movie was close to ending at that point, but I figured they would try to work in some kind of plot point as to why he has that leg to begin with. They don't, and the only thing you do learn about his leg is that it makes some annoying noise whenever he walks on it. So yeah, the mystery as to why he has that leg boils down to fuck you, that is why.

And as for our main villain, Eve, she is quite possibly one of the most retarded villains I have ever come across in a family film in a long time. And there's one scene that proved, to me, why she's fucking retarded. Right towards the end of the film, she holds Jeremy hostage and demands that Chase give her the laser gun in exchange for his son. Well, right before he does this, he secretly activates a self-destruct button on the gun, which by itself is completely fucking stupid, but I'll leave that aside for now. Anyway, they make the exchange and she tries to fire the laser gun, only for it to not work and she doesn't know why. She then later finds out that the gun is about to explode, and she doesn't know how to turn it off. Even though she's the one who presented the damn gun at the beginning of the movie to a bunch of people during a demonstration! How the fuck she didn't know all about the gun's features makes her, and also her entire entourage of villains, completely fucking retarded on a level that I haven't seen in a good long while! Christ almighty...

So anyway, setting aside the most incompetent villains in history, what about our main cast? Well, as I already mentioned earlier, Hogan is barely in it for a good chunk of the movie. If I had to make a summarized guess, I believe he's only in it for about half an hour tops, where he's mostly just held hostage by our villains. And as for our kids, well, they're not really all that memorable. You have Jeremy, who seems to have something of a neglectful relationship with his father after the mother died. The movies really does nothing with it beyond that. Then you have Rosalie, who's basically the girl that Jeremy likes. You have Bart, who's basically the fat kid. Sly, the black kid who's also a hacker. Then there's Shigeo, who seems to be something of a racist casting choice, because the movie clearly wants to let you know that he's Japanese and that he speaks Japanese, and he's also good at karate. Yeah, clearly, he's not a racist caricature at all. And normally, I don't really care about this kind of thing, unlike most people who deem things in older films as "problematic". However, since this movie is very blatant about this character, it's clear that they weren't trying to hide it at all.

So anyway, setting aside all that, the characters in this movie are, like I said, not all that memorable. Now to be fair to this movie's cast, and setting aside the obvious racist casting choice, they actually do a decent job on making these characters likable. They're not overly annoying, unlike a lot of kid characters I've seen in other family films of the past. Which I know may not sound like much, but I can at least say that it's a slight step above something like "Mr. Nanny", another Hulk Hogan movie where the two leading kids in that film were annoying as shit. Granted, you could say on how they get inside the villain's base by using toy guns and other kids toys to infiltrate the base is incredibly stupid. But part of me is tempted to let that kind of thing slide, since this film is also catered towards children as well. Mind you, there's quite a bit of product placement in this movie involving the Nerf guns. I'm going to assume someone made a deal with Nerf to advertise their products for this movie and, well, at least Nerf got some free money out of it. So, I guess that's something for them.

Anyway, setting aside the product placement, the writing here as a whole is just about as stupid as you could possibly imagine when it comes to a family film like this. Mind you, I still think there is a little bit of charm to this movie in which I could overlook some of the obvious stupidity. Well, except for the villains, for obvious reasons that I've already talked about. But with that said, let's talk about the acting next. And as for our main child characters, they do a a pretty decent job for the material that they had to work with. The only slight exception to all this is Jeremy's actor, because I clearly believe that, at times, his acting sounds very flaky. And in some cases, he always has this weird smile to his face in a lot of his scenes, especially when he's trying to act down or kinda sad. But it's not all that good. And also, there's a couple of scenes where Hogan's being strapped down and he has some kind of device over his eyes, and the video is playing a looped clip of his son demanding him to confess where the laser gun is. These scenes are incredibly annoying, and his acting, minus being looped on repeat, sounds a little bit forced. Mind you, he's not the worst case of child acting that I've seen, but it's still something that I wanted to mention.

Now as for Hulk Hogan, well, it's kind of mixed bag. Seeing as how he doesn't have very many lines in this movie, I'm going to assume that was possibly done intentionally. Allow me to explain. You see, I've mentioned in the past that Hogan's acting in his movies has always sounded wooden. And this movie is no exception, because his acting is very clearly wooden here. And I believe that, given Hogan's limited acting skills, the filmmakers wanted to take advantage of it by not having him doing very much while the kids take over the lead here. Now one hand, I can see the intention behind it, because Hogan doesn't have much of a range in his acting skills and they didn't want hamper him with too many lines that might make him sound terrible. On the other hand, he *is* still the star of the movie, and I feel like they could've given him more screen time to work with, if they wanted to give him something to do, but also not act out a whole lot of dialogue at the same time. Mind you, my assumption on all this is only a theory. So, you have to take what I said for what it's worth. Regardless, his acting is still wooden here, and I don't see that changing for any of his other movies that I might end up covering. I could be wrong there, but I strongly doubt it.

Anyway, special effects range on having incredibly average-looking CG, especially for a mid-90's movie. Granted, a lot of that is limited to the laser gun in the beginning of the movie, and it's really nothing special at all. There's also a lot of pyrotechnics in this movie as well. Granted, it's not as much as, say, what Michael Bay would put in his movies, or as over the top like Andy Sidaris's "Triple B" series, which I'm still covering at the time that I'm writing this review. But still, they do exist in this movie, and it's just kinda average, really. So, overall, the special effects are nothing to write home about.

Camerawork in this movie is mostly good, save for one panning shot in which Wrecks is getting out of his car. And on the reflection of the car door, you can actually see some of the film crew either crouching or standing clearly in the shot, including one noticeable guy whom was wearing a white T-shirt. How the hell that actually got past editors is beyond me, since that's an obvious case of amateurish camerawork. But aside from that, the camerawork here is still fine. Lighting here is really good. The sound-mixing here is decent. The music here really isn't all that memorable. Including a little bit of rap that played during the ending credits, and it sounded really fucking terrible. So, the music here is mostly below average. I would've said it was fine, though what little I heard from that rap song sounded deducted it from being just okay to really kinda shit.

Now with all that said, when it comes down to it, am I able to recommend "The Secret Agent Club"? Well, if you have kids, then yes. I would say this is perfectly fine for children, because kids aren't gonna notice the obvious flaws this movie has. If you, yourself, are curious to know how Hogan would fare in this movie, well...I guess I could say give it a shot. However, keep it mind that he's not in the movie all that much. Unless you're okay with kids being the main lead over the Hulkster, then you can probably just skip this, since there's not much here to work with, at least as far as I can when talking about a movie starring Hluk Hogan. Still though, I do think that it's worth at least a single viewing. I don't know if I would recommend a full physical purchase, unless if you can find it dirt cheap somewhere. And I mean like *really* cheap, something close to a dollar. If not, then you can probably just skip this movie entirely. I myself did enjoy it, but I wouldn't say it's worth getting for my DVD collection. Speaking of which, I still have "Suburban Commando" sitting there to where I can see it. So, I'm gonna go and watch that next, because it's been a good long while since I last watched it, and it would be a nice film to see to honor the late Hulk Hogan anyways.

And with that, guys, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all later. Peace.

Reaction and Review | The Dallas Connection

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, guys, we continue the "Triple B" series by taking a look at it's 10th entry, which came out in 1994. That movie is "The Dallas Connection".

Now as I established back in my review of "Enemy Gold", this is the second of two films in which Andy Sidaris's son, Christian Drew Sidaris, wrote and directed in this series. And in case you didn't read my review of "Enemy Gold", I thought the film was just OK. It certainly wasn't the best film I've seen in the "Triple B", but it's also not the worst either. It just kinda stands in being a little bit average.

But now I get to see if Drew Sidaris did anything to improve on this, and see whether or not it can retain the Sidaris charm that almost all of these movies have. I don't know anything about the plot, but then again, "plot" is the last thing that most people will care about when it comes to this series. Still, I'm curious to see what this movie can do here. The only way I'm gonna find out if this movie is interesting at all is if I shut up and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "The Dallas Connection".

5 minutes later

Oh my god, that has got to be one of the fakest-looking mustaches I've ever seen committed to film! I hope that it's just part of a shitty disguise, otherwise, I really have to ask why the fuck is this guy in a suit supporting an incredibly fake mustache? That looks incredibly cheap, even for low budget standards. Just...god, that looks awful.

1 minute later

OK, never mind, it was indeed part of a shitty disguise. Granted, it still looked terrible, but at least the movie was kind enough to address that.

9 minutes later

OK, I do have a question here. Is it normal for women to play golf while wearing a silver-looking tank top? I mean, OK sure, she's a wearing red skirt and white tennis shoes. I mean, that's perfectly normal. But I don't know how common it is for them to be wearing a tank top while golfing. Mind you, I'm not exactly complaining about it, it's just something I wanted to ask is all.

5 minutes later

Well, this is a first, guys. This is the first in this series where I see a golf ball exploding. Granted, that kill wasn't exactly great, but at least the method behind it was sorta creative.

17 minutes later

Well, guys, I can say, so far, that this movie has been a little bit dull for the past while now, but at least we're now finally getting another piece of T&A. You know, one of the actual selling points of these movies to begin with. It's just that I really wish this movie wouldn't drag so much, because the pacing is becoming a little bit of an issue right now. I'm hoping that we get more interesting stuff going on as the film progresses. So far, though, this movie hasn't given me much to work with at the moment.

15 minutes later

All right, guys, this is the second time that this happened in this series, but we now have a fantasy dream sequence where Antonio is fantasizing about Samantha stripping while they're having dinner at a fancy restaurant. Now that, by itself, is weird enough. But do you want to what makes this scene even weirder? The actor who's playing Antonio is the same guy who played the main villain, Santiago, from the previous film "Enemy Gold". That just makes this scene *incredibly* more weirder! Just thought I'd mention that.

9 minutes later

Again, guys, this is the second time that this has happened in this movie, but we're now being treated to another softcore bondage striptease from Black Widow here. I would say that this is full on BDSM, but until I start seeing ball gags and such, I'm going to withhold my status on that. At least, for the moment.

The Review

Well, guys, that was "The Dallas Connection". Let me go ahead and shut the movie off now...OK. God, that song kinda sucked. Well, um...where do I begin here? I'll say this much, guys, I'm not surprised that Andy Sidaris took over after this, because this movie kinda proved to me that Drew Sidaris doesn't know how to write an interesting story. I know that may not sound like much, but I'll talk more about why this film doesn't exactly work here.

Which, on that note, let's start with the writing here. More specifically, I actually want to talk about pacing, because the pacing in this movie is just horrible. There are scenes in this movie that extend themselves way too fucking long, such as the assassinations that go on in the beginning of the movie. That whole sequence took 20 minutes to get through before we actually start off with our "plot". Or lack thereof, but I'll get to that in a second. Another example of this movie's pacing issues has to do with our two male heroes, Chris and Mark, who get seduced by two other girls named Cobra and Scorpion, who are there to steal these microchips for a satellite, which is also, in part, why this movie's called "The Dallas Connection". And these scenes in particular take *forever* to get through. And mind you, the movie's only a little over a half an hour long, but it almost feels like it was extended to a two hour movie. Which is partly the reason why this film feels so dull and boring.

Speaking of, that leads me into the actual writing for this movie. Well, "actual writing" is a bit of a stretch here because there is no fucking writing. The story feels like it was lifted from an older film by Drew's father and he just kinda reworked it in a way that it doesn't feel interesting to watch. In fact, there are scenes in this movie where they just rehashed ideas from previous movies in the "Triple B" series. Such as when Cobra, the blond haired girl, uses a remote controlled toy as a bomb to blow up her targets. Or when I mentioned Antonio having a fantasy dream about Samantha stripping over dinner. Well, the idea of a villain fantasizing about a girl was also lifted from a previous film by Andy Sidaris. And if I'm not mistaken, both of these ideas were lifted from "Fit To Kill", which was the 8th film in this series. Now I understand that when you're doing a long-running series that you begin to run the risk of running out of ideas, but I was still at least expecting something interesting here, despite the blatant rehashing of ideas. And unfortunately, that's the not the case here.

In fact, I'm gonna tell you guys the difference on how Andy Sidaris handled his movies, and how Drew handled his. You see, for all of the varying qualities that Andy's films had, all of his films, barring "Hard Hunted", had a unique charm to it that made you want to keep watching them. And the plots he had, while, again, varied in different qualities, he was still able to at least write something that was kinda sorta interesting. The only exception was "Hard Hunted", because it felt like Andy just phoned it in with that one. But the thing is, Andy was able to at least rebound with "Fit To Kill", because it was actually kinda interesting. Not exactly "good", mind you, but then again, none of these movies are actually "good", they're just cheesy, action movies with a lot of bad acting, sexy women, and over-the-top action scenes. And with "Fit To Kill", it was a return to basics with what made Andy Sidaris's films so interesting in the first place.

Now, with Drew Sidaris's movies, it's the complete opposite. With "Enemy Gold", he had an interesting idea for a plot, but never really did much with it. In this movie, he didn't have an interesting idea to start with and it just results in a boring plotless action movie. And I know I've stated at the start of this that nobody watches these particular action movies for plot, but as I said earlier, you still want to make your stories somewhat interesting, which is what Andy Sidaris did for almost all of his movies. But with his son, he didn't do that here. There's almost interesting that happens, storywise. And as for the Sidaris charm that I've brought up before, well...the ingredients are there what with your standard T&A, along with over-the-top action scenes. The problem here is that it's just not utilized very well. And on top of that, the tone for this movie feels very off. Because with the previous films, most of those were comedies, while this one, to an extent, tries to take itself seriously. Sure, there's cheesy dialogue here and there, but most of that is sporadic, and you don't get most of that until the final climax of the movie. Which, even then, is also not very interesting, because they don't really do very much here.

And as for characters, well Chris and Mark, who were in Drew's previous film "Enemy Gold" do make a return here. What happened to Becky Midnite is anyone's guess because she doesn't make a return here. Instead, we have a new blond bombshell agent by the name of Samantha. And, much like with Becky and our two male agents, they're all completely bland as hell. Now again, I'm not expecting character depth from an action movie of this caliber, but I was still at least expecting something out of our characters. Instead, they're all just there, really. Same with our villains, although two of them are also very similar because they're played by the very same actors who played villains in "Enemy Gold". One of them is Black Widow, who is played by Julie Strain, and Rodrigo Obregon, who also plays the film's villain. Although they tried to make it as a twist, though, really, it's a half-assed twist which doesn't make very much sense. But then again, the lack of story here really doesn't do this twist any justice.

So yeah, guys, the "writing" here is completely plotless and what little is here feels like a lifted idea from one Andy Sidaris's films. And while the ingredients for an Andy Sidaris flick are here, it's just not utilized very well at all. It just feels like, similar to what I mentioned about "Hard Hunted", Drew Sidaris just phoned it in and didn't even try at all to make this film interesting. And on top of all that, the acting here is also completely terrible. OK yes, I know that's pretty much a standard when it comes to a Sidaris film, and, if there's any real credit I can give this movie, is that at least the acting here is on par with what I saw in the previous films. Which, for any other movies series, I would completely blast this movie to high heaven with it's horrible acting. But, at the very least, it's still kinda on par with it being so bad, it's funny. So, I can at least grant this movie that much, for better or worse.

Special effects are also another thing that are a standard when it comes to these movies. Squib-work, pyrotechnics, etc. It's still there, though admittedly, it's also very sporadic. Because you know how I mentioned the golf ball explosion from way early on? Well, the next explosion doesn't kick in until well over an hour later, during the film's climax. Which I normally wouldn't cover this sort of thing, however, with how boring this movie is, I couldn't help but notice that much. The only thing I can mention about costuming is Black Widow's outfit, because it basically just looks like she's wearing a dominatrix outfit. Which probably is that, though it does come sorta close to it being a BDSM costume. I don't know if that's the exact same thing, but whatever. It's just the only noticeable costume I saw while watching the movie.

Anyway, camerawork here is decent. Lighting here is fine. The sound-mixing here is also decent. The music here ranges on a lot of saxophone, guitar, and they even had a couple of songs here. Granted, I've never heard of these songs before, and both really kinda suck, but at least it's something that I haven't seen in a Sidaris project in a while. So, I guess that's something.

But overall, guys, when all is said and done, am I able to recommend "The Dallas Connection"? Honestly...no. Because, like I said earlier, it felt like a phoned in performance by Drew Sidaris, and I'm, once again, not surprised that he didn't get any other directorial work after this because this movie is just so damn boring and lazy. I can give "Enemy Gold" a little bit of a pass because at least it kinda had a little bit of spirit from Andy Sidaris's previous movies. This one, though, just didn't have that. And because of which, you can honestly just skip this movie and you wouldn't be missing a thing. Unless, of course, that you want to watch all of the films in the "Triple B" series, like I've been doing. But when I do eventually rewatch these movies again, I'm going to skip this one because it has nothing of value for me to go back to. And speaking of, I'm gonna go and rewatch another film from this series. Don't know which one yet, but I'll just marathon a couple of these movies because I need to watch something better right now that doesn't have Drew's name attached to it.

So anyway, guys, with that, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all later. Peace.

Reaction & Review | Beetlejuice

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, guys, I'm gonna be covering a horror comedy from 1988. That movie is "Beetlejuice".

Now, I have a story about this movie. You see, I have technically seen this movie before. However...when I say that, I've really only seen the ending to this film at least a few times before. Most of the time I saw this movie is when they would usually air it on the Freeform channel, AKA ABC Family. And despite me having seen the ending to this film a few different times, I don't understand the whole context to it. So I finally decided to track this movie down via a two-pack, which also comes with it's sequel. And yes, I will actually cover the sequel later this month.

For now, though, I'm only gonna focus on this movie. As for what I remember about it, I do know that it stars Michael Keaton as our main titled character, and I also know the film is directed by Tim Burton, who usually tends into the dark fantasy that he's usually comfortable with. This movie is obviously gonna be no exception. As to whether it'll be good or not has yet to remain seen. I am aware that it is one of Burton's most popular movies, but just because something's popular doesn't mean that it's necessarily going to be good.

That being said, I am still looking forward to finally watching this movie in it's entirety. I am hoping for it to be good, though I am prepared for the slight possibility that it could also suck. I don't know yet, but I am gonna find out. And the only way to do that is for me to shut up so I can push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "Beetlejuice".

19 minutes later

OK, I have a question here, and it's starting to bug me a little bit. So, our main couple are now ghosts, and they're trying every way to scare the new people moving into their house. Adam has now closed the door to the attic and apparently locked it, too. But since he and Barbara are now ghosts, then how is Adam able to interact with his door and is able to lock it, too? I mean, if they're dead, then they really shouldn't be physically interacting with *anything* in their house, right? I'm really kinda curious here.

14 minutes later

You know, guys, for the amount of time that Adam and Barbara have been dead, they're surprisingly taking everything that they've seen so far rather well. And I mean more of the horror imagery rather than their house being taken over, obviously. I guess, after being dead for a while, being surprised by anything isn't really that much of a common occurrence anymore to them.

9 minutes later

Hold up. So earlier, either Adam or Barbara was wearing a sheet to act as a ghost and scare the people living in their home. The daughter can see them, even without their sheets. And yet, just a few minutes ago, when they were scaring her Dad, he could see the sheets, too. So...does that mean then that if you are wearing something like a sheet, then normal people can actually see you? I admit, that doesn't entirely make sense, but I'm gonna wait and see if this movie attempts to explain that at all.

5 minutes later

OK, I have been meaning to ask this for a while now. Why is the name Beetlejuice spelled differently in this film? I'm going to assume maybe there's some kind of actual reason for it, but it's starting to bug me a little bit because I've seen his name spelled like this throughout the entire movie. Maybe that's how his name is supposed to be spelled, but it still kinda bothers me slightly, you know what I mean?

8 minutes later

OK, I was gonna ask what the hell kind of plan they had in mind. And I will say that, while that plan was goofy as shit, the pay off was actually really cool. So, I really gotta give Barbara and Adam props for coming up with something that was sorta creative.

15 minutes later

You know, I'm a little surprised that Adam and Barbara are still talking to each other, despite changing their faces to look scarier and such. By the way, the makeup effects here look awesome. However, I'll talk about that later when I get to reviewing this film.

The Review

Well, guys, that was "Beetlejuice". And now that I've seen the whole thing, I know kind of understand the context of the ending...kind of. Still doesn't entirely make sense, but I'm not gonna continue to question it further. I'm just gonna shut the movie off now...OK. Well, I suppose I should let you guys know, first hand, that I really enjoyed this movie. Now is it my favorite film from Tim Burton? No. Personally, I would never put it above something like the 1989 "Batman" movie, or even "Batman Returns" for that matter. But I still enjoyed this film for what it is.

So let's start this review off here by first talking about the writing. Now, you may have noticed that I started to ask questions about certain things that didn't really make sense to me. And as the film went on, I continued to ask more questions. And you might think that, even though I just said I enjoyed this movie, that I would end up disliking it because some of those questions kept piling up. And I'm gonna tell you guys that a lot of those issues that I had are very trivial in the long run. As long as you're willing to suspend your disbelief and just accept certain things for what they are, then you are going to enjoy this film immensely. Especially if you're someone who still hasn't seen this movie yet and you enjoy the works of Tim Burton, and you're into the kind of horror that doesn't necessarily go overboard into straight up slasher territory, then this film will be perfect for you. Provided, again, that you're willing to suspend your disbelief here.

Our characters here are fleshed out and each have their own unique personality. Which I believe helps make this film stand out because there's a character here for everyone to like. In which, I mean, that you're not required to like every single character here, but there is enough to where you could pick a favorite out of our cast here. Whether it's our two main characters trying desperately to get their home back, or Lydia, or her two parents. Well, correction, the mother from "Home Alone" is technically her stepmom. I personally didn't care for her character here at all, but I can see someone being attached to it for whatever reason. And, of course, you have our titled character as well, who is amazing. Granted, there are a couple of noticeable problems that involve him, which I'll talk about in a second here. But to summarize, our characters here are great, and they help make this movie stand out immensely.

Now as for our titled character, there are two issues that stood out to me about him. The first one is that, even though henis technically the star of the movie, he's not in it for all that long, especially for the first half of the movie. He only has about three appearances in the first half, and each scene with him is very sporadic. For the first half, most of it is spent on our two main characters, Adam and Barbara, as they try to scare out this new family that bought out their house after their deaths. And you don't really see enough of our titled character outside of several brief moments. Now in fairness, the movie actually does make it a note to our main couple that they shouldn't ask for his help by calling his name 3 times. Instead, they should scare out this new family that took over their home by themselves. Which makes some sense, because our titled character has his own unique ways to scare people. I won't spoil how exactly on the off chance that you still haven't seen this film yet. But still, seeing as how he doesn't appear in the film all that much is a little bit underwhelming at times.

Now the other issue involving our titled character actually to do with his name. You probably noticed that I haven't been using his name. And it's not because of "fear" that if I repeat his name 3 times, he'll appear. It's more so with how his name is actually spelled here. See, while the film itself is called "Beetlejuice", his actual name is spelled as B-E-T-E-L-G-E-U-S-E, or "Betelgeuse" for short. Now I genuinely don't know what the issue was regarding his name. I don't know if his actual spelled name would've been a hit for the title of the movie, or if it was some sort of inside joke that I didn't get. But regardless, his actual name is different from the title, and it's just something that I think you just have to take for what it's worth. It's ultimately not a big deal in the long run, but it is something that could make you raise an eyebrow, especially when you first notice his actual name popping up on screen.

And yeah, as you probably guessed, both of these issues are incredibly minor in the end. And you're not really not gonna notice them very much unless you have a stickler attention to detail like I do. And even if you do notice it, you're not gonna really care about it because the film itself has more than enough quality to where it outweighs the negatives by a mile. And the film is also very entertaining, too. Which is great, and it also has great pacing as well. It doesn't really slow itself down too much, but also isn't rushing things either. It has a near perfect balance of where it wants to go, and it doesn't overstay it's welcome. Then again, the movie's only about 90 minutes long, which, to me, is a perfect runtime that most comedies should have. Though that's just more of a personal bias, really.

So yeah, guys, writing here is really strong, and our characters are all likable and fleshed out. And when you make both of those elements work together, especially with Burton's own kind of flair added to the mix, it makes for a really entertaining movie. And as for the acting, well, the acting here is fantastic, guys. Every single actor turns in 110%. The biggest stand out, of course, is gonna be Michael Keaton as Betelgeuse. The man is having a blast with his role. And even though I would've like to have seen more of him here, what he's able to do is still amazing. And I'm grateful that he did live up to his character here. Everyone from Geena Davis, Alec Baldwin, Winona Ryder, to Jeffery Jones and the late Catherine O' Hara, they give just about as much effort as Keaton did, and it's fantastic across the board. There wasn't a single actor who phoned it in, which is also great to see.

Special effects are also absolutely phenomenal. Now again, since this is a film from Tim Burton, you're gonna be expecting to see a lot of his style added into the effects. And the best part about it is that, even though he likes to rely a lot on Gothic horror, he never takes it too far. Well, except for "Batman Returns", although that's more of a different issue with how that film was received by fans. But my point is, since this is technically a family film, he knows when to reign it in, but still is able to add his own creativity here. And a lot of it here comes from the stop-motion animation. There is quite a lot of stop-motion used in this movie, such as the sand worm that you see in the beginning, or the infamous snake version of Betelgeuse you see in the latter half of the film. Both instances look fantastic. This is some of the best stop-motion animation you'll ever see, at least for 1988 standards. The makeup effects are also great, too. The most noticeable one is Betelgeuse himself, though that one's more iconic than anything else. Costuming here is really good. The sets are amazing, especially for anytime that you are inside Betelgeuse's world. It looks really cool. If I had to nitpick anything, I would say the backgrounds for the sand world might look like it was shot on a blue screen. If it was a legitimate set, then I would be shocked. Though I don't know if that was the case or not. Regardless, it looked really cool, so I'm not about to dump on it.

Camerawork here is really good. Lighting here is great. The sound-mixing here is also good. The score here is great, as it is composed by Danny Elfman. Granted, he's done a lot of musical scores for Burton's movies. And while the score here is, admittedly, not as good as his other ones, it's still really fucking good. And I'm never gonna say that his music is crap or anything. It's just not as good as some of his other scores are in other films.

So anyway, guys, when all is said and done, am I able to recommend "Beetlejuice"? Oh yes, guys, most certainly. I mean, at this point, it's very much a Burton classic. And I completely understand why this film has been beloved for all these years. Now again, I don't consider this to be a high favorite of mine, especially from Burton, but I can't deny that it has a lot of charm to it. And I'm really glad that I actually got to finally watch it for this series. Now, as I mentioned before, I do have it's sequel as part of a 2-pack, so I will be covering it later this month. Whether it'll be any good or not is something that I'll eventually figure out for myself when I get to covering it. Now, there is one neat feature about this 2-pack. Both movies come individually as their own movie, unlike the "Gremlins" 2-pack where both movies are together on one disc. And on the first disc for the first "Beetlejuice" movie, it actually comes with 3 bonus episodes from the "Beetlejuice" animated series. I've never seen it before, so I'm gonna go and watch those 3 episodes right now, because if they're any good, I may end up checking out the rest of the series on YouTube, provided it's available anyway.

And on that note, guys, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all later. Peace.

Reaction & Review | Enemy Gold

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, guys, we're continuing the "Triple B" series that I started back in 2024, and, throughout this month, I'm gonna be taking a look at the last four films in this series. And we're gonna kick things off by checking out the 9th entry in this series, which is also an action film from 1993. That movie is "Enemy Gold".

Now this film is a bit of an interesting one for a couple of different reasons. The first one being that this was the film that actually got me introduced to Andy Sidaris's movies in the first place. I actually wanted to cover this film first just out of sheer curiosity. And this was before I even did research into the fact that this film was part of a series, mainly the "Triple B" series. So maybe it was actually a good thing I started off at the beginning with "Malibu Express" before even jumping into this one.

The second reason why this film is a bit more interesting has to do with it's writer and director. See, throughout most of the "Triple B" series, most of them were written and directed by Andy Sidaris. And while he is still a producer for this movie, he's not the director this time. This one, along with the next film which I'll cover next week, was directed by his son, Drew Sidaris. He also co-wrote the film with someone named Wess Rahn. Now I unfortunately don't have much information about Drew Sidaris's film biography. All I know is that he directed both this and next week's movie that I'll cover.

Now, I'm curious to find out what exactly the son of Andy Sidaris can do here. I'm hoping that he'll add something to this movie series. Or, at the very least, keep within the tradition of it being another cheeseball, action film in his father's vision. I'm not sure which way this film will go, but I'm really interested to find out for myself. And the only way I'm gonna do that is if I shut up and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "Enemy Gold".

4 minutes later

OK, so, you guys remembered back in my review of "Fit To Kill" where I talked about how strange it was that it actually used stock footage from WWII? Well, this movie is going back a little more ways by doing some sort of reenactment from the Civil War. And the gold that some guy is currently burying is, I'm going to assume, our plot device of the movie. I'm guessing either Andy Sidaris, or someone in his family, were big fans of history to being used in some capacity with his movies. Whether that's the case or not, I do find it to be rather interesting, you know what I mean?

18 minutes later

So, guys, I may as well go ahead and say that, while there really isn't much of a story here, so far, I can say that, despite Andy Sidaris not having a hand in this one other than being an executive producer, the charm is still here. Though granted, the film is moving rather slow right now. But, at the very least, the charm is still there.

15 minutes later

Well, guys, I can tell you one other thing that hasn't changed within the past 9 movies of this particular series. The acting here is terrible. In fact, this may be one of the worst acted films in all of Andy Sidaris's movies that I've seen far. And that's saying a lot, mind you, considering how much of the acting was bad in the previous films. This one, though, is already ranking pretty high up there. And also, this isn't technically Andy's film to begin with, which makes it even more weirder than usual. Just saying.

17 minutes later

O...K. Well, I'm glad to see, after 9 movies, that these films still live up to their insane wackiness. Because Jewell just shot a flare gun inside of a fuel storage unit, where one of the park rangers was sorta hiding in, and blowing it the fuck up. That was actually pretty awesome.

4 minutes later

So let me see if I understand this. Santiago is gonna have his two men watch over the old lodge where our agents are gonna be staying the night in. And tomorrow morning, they're gonna reunite and kill them together before going after the gold. Why not just take them out while they're fast asleep? I think that would make a lot more sense than just waiting the next morning to take them out. Wouldn't that be the more fast and efficient way to handle them? Maybe that's just me, though, because I have something called a functioning brain, while Santiago apparently doesn't.

11 minutes later

Damn, that's...actually one of the more brutal kills I've seen in this entire series of movies. Just...damn, that's actually kinda sickening, really.

The Review

Well, guys, that was "Enemy Gold". Let me go ahead and shut the movie off here...OK. Well, now that I'm back reviewing these particular movies, how well does this one hold up? Especially knowing that it wasn't written or directed by Andy Sidaris, but rather his son. Well, honestly, the movie is just OK. It's certainly not one of the more interesting films in the entirety of the "Triple B" series, but I still can't say that it's the weakest either. That, to me, is still gonna be "Hard Hunted". But then again, it's gonna take a lot to be as weak as that film was.

So anyway, let's just dive right into this film here and see what I can talk about here. Let's start with the writing. Now, if you're not familiar with any of the "Triple B" movies, don't worry, because a lot of these films are gonna be summed up as not having much of a plot to begin with. Oh sure, there is some attempt at telling some kind of story with each film, however, the main selling point of these films that were mostly made by Andy Sidaris revolves around several things. Hot women, over-the-top action scenes, and a lot of T&A. And this movie checks out on all of that. Granted, the action scenes in this movie aren't nearly as interesting as they were in most of the previous "Triple B" movies, but it still has some creativity in here that I haven't seen done before, such as the scene I mentioned earlier involving the flare gun. So at least the charm of Andy Sidaris is still here.

And as I just mentioned involving the plot to these movies, there really isn't much of any plot here. In fact, this movie, in particular, out of all the films I've seen in the "Triple B" series, probably has the least amount of plot to begin with. Essentially, there's some gold from the Civil War that was buried somewhere, and our team of agents are looking for it while they're on their camping trip. Mind you, they're on their camping trip after they were recently suspended by some agent named Dickson, because they were invading private property to stop a drug bust. Because that makes a ton of sense, somehow. Well, to be fair, Dickson is secretly working with a drug lord named Santiago, who's main priority is to take out the three agents who stand in his way. And he's also bringing along another female agent named Jewell, who I'll talk about later on when I get to acting.

But yeah, plotwise, it's honestly one of the weakest I've seen in the entirety of the "Triple B" series, and it's one that you're not really going to care about either. Even when they show stuff involving the Civil War, it's not something that you're going to take notice of, unless if you're somehow a history buff who's also into movies like this one. And as for the characters, well, one thing that you'll probably notice, especially if you've been following these particular movies up till this point is where exactly are Donna and Nicole? Because they were in the previous movies for quite a long time, and this is the first one where they are not present. Well honestly, I don't really know what happened. I don't know if these characters are retired or whatnot. But either way, they don't show up here. And I have no idea if they show up in any of the remaining 3 movies after this one.

But setting that aside for now, we have our new agents to focus on for this movie. And I'll tell you right now that they're all pretty damn bland. We have our blonde bombshell Becky, a sort blond-haired guy named Chris, and Mark, the black haired guy. These are the 3 agents that we're following as the main protagonists and, like I just said, they're all pretty bland and not really that interesting. Becky and Chris are suppose to be a pair, while Mark is suppose to have a thing for their boss, Ava, who I *think* may have been from one of the previous movies in this series, though I'm not totally sure or not. I would have to rewatch these movies again in order to ascertain that because it's been quite a while since I last watched them. As for our villains, well, like I already mentioned, Santiago is a criminal drug lord, while Dickson is the traitorous agent, and Jewell is also rather bland, too. And also has some of the most laughably bad acting in the entire "Triple B" series.

In fact, let's actually talk about the acting next, since there's not much else I can say about this plotless story. Now one thing you have to know when going into a movie such as this from the "Triple B" series is that almost all of the acting here isn't going to be any good, and this movie is no exception. The acting here is stilted and wooden from the entire cast. It's quite honestly one of the most poorly acted films in the entire "Triple B" series. Which is saying a lot, because I had to listen Donna and Nicole's acting for a good chunk of this series, and they barely improved from each different movie. This acting, though, is definitely some of the worst I have heard in this series. Which is definitely an accomplishment, for better or worse.

Speaking of, let's talk about Jewell's actress here. She goes by the name of Julie Strain, and she is easily the worst actress in this entire movie. Because every single line of dialogue she gives out is so wooden and robotic that none of it sounds natural whatsoever. And normally, I would say this as a bad thing, however, with her kind of delivery, it actually turns this wooden stilted dialogue into being incredibly laughable. I'm serious, guys, her delivery with her lines is so bad, and almost cringeworthy, but it's one of those rare times that I actually kinda liked it. And I believe that's mainly because of how laughably terrible it is. So, as much as I want to criticize her acting even more, I'm going to give it a pass here. At least for now. Because, checking ahead a little bit, she's apparently in the other 3 movies that I'll cover later this month. So. I'm going to see what she does here, because I have no idea if she's going to either continue this level of laughably bad acting, or if she's somehow going to get better with it. I honestly don't think she will, but there's still 3 movies left, so I'm going to hold my judgement there until we get to them. But as for the rest of the acting, none of it is any good, as has been the case for most of, if not all of the movies, in the "Triple B" series.

Special effects are also another similar trend with the "Triple B" series. Because a lot of it boils down to the squibwork involving guns or the pyrotechnics. You might get some blood effects here and there, though it's not very much. And this movie is no exception. All of it is something that is prevalent in the previous films, and while it's certainly nowhere near as interesting as it was there, it still has one or two moments where they try to make it interesting. So in that sense, the special effects here are average at best.

Camerawork here is pretty good. Lighting here is great, as most of this was shot outdoors. Sound-mixing here is also good. The music here, at least in terms of score, is actually pretty good, too. There's a lot of electric guitar going on in this movie, and it's actually pretty good for what it is. So I'm going to give the score here as another positive.

So when all is said and done, guys, can I recommend "Enemy Gold"? Only if you are a fan of these cheeseball action films with little to no plot. Or if you have seen all of the movies in the "Triple B" series, and you want to keep going with it, then I would say go ahead and check it out. Again, while I don't think it's as interesting as the previous movies were, there's something here to where you could find some enjoyment out of it. Provided, of course, you're into these movies to begin with. If not, then obviously, there's not much of a reason for you to watch these movies at all. But as for me, I'm still looking forward to seeing how the rest of these movies will play itself out. I'm hoping that Drew Sidaris can improve with the next film, seeing as how this one was just OK. But I'll wait until next week for that. Until then, I'm gonna go back and rewatch the first few films again in the "Triple B" series. Partially because it's that time of year for it, and I consider these my summer movies anyway. So I'm gonna go and do that next after I get done with this review.

Anyway, guys, with that, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all later. Peace.

Reaction & Review | Krull

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, guys, I'm gonna be checking out a fantasy movie from 1983. That movie is "Krull".

Now, I remember seeing a little bit of this movie a few years ago on TV while I was on vacation, and I remember it looking very interesting. Now granted, I didn't really understand what the hell was going on, as I caught most of the latter act. And even then, I don't remember anything from it. So when I actually found a copy of it at one of my local video stores, I jumped on it for about $6. I'm hoping that it's gonna be worth it, eventually.

Now as for what I know about the movie, well, I do know that it's a fantasy movie, and I also know one of the stars of this movie is a much younger Liam Neeson. Now mind you, it's not exactly his earliest film, but it is still something that predates stuff like "Taken", for example. I haven't really seen a whole lot of films involving Liam Neeson, but I am aware of that series, at least.

So, I'm curious to find out how exactly Liam Neeson is gonna handle himself here in one of his earlier roles. I'm also curious to see whether or not this movie is actually gonna be any good. The only way I am gonna find out is if I shut up and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "Krull".

13 minutes later

So these Slayers can shoot laser beams from their swords. That's sorta cool. I never would've known that, personally, but that is something worth noting.

13 minutes later

Is he seriously sticking his hand inside molting hot water in order to retrieve this Glaive weapon? And I should note that there was fire coming out from this water the moment that Prince Colwyn put his hand inside of it, and he's not feeling any sort of pain from it, nor are there any burn marks that I can see after he just pulled it out. Oh, and the Glaive is now shining through from it's molten debris, what do you know. Anyway, guys, I just found that whole sequence to be really odd, you know what I mean?

20 minutes later

I am gonna say this much, guys, the special effects in this movie are fantastic. I really wish I had more to say about it, but unfortunately, there's not much else I can go on right now. At the very least, it's keeping my interest going, so at least that's something.

13 minutes later

O...K, I genuinely had no idea what happened to the old guy after his doppelganger appeared a moment ago. I will say, at the very least, that I wasn't expecting that to happen to him.

11 minutes later

You know, guys, the acting here in this movie has been really good so far. The only one who has kinda sucked is the princess, Lyssa, the redhead trapped in the Black Fortress. For some reason, none of her dialogue sounds believable. I'm hoping, maybe, her acting will improve within the next 50 minutes or so this movie has left, but I'm not totally sure if it actually will or not.

20 minutes later

So these horses are traveling faster with fire coming out of their hooves while our heroes are fast traveling via a green screen. I will say that, while it does look cool, I have to wonder how much grass they're burning along the way? You'd think that someone might've thought about that, but I guess not. Still though, at least it looks cool.

The Review

Well, guys, that was "Krull". Let me go ahead and shut the movie off here...OK. So, where to begin here? I suppose I should reiterate that I did see a little bit of this movie some years ago. And at the time, I didn't really understand a lot of what was going on. I knew what parts I saw, but I didn't understand the context. It was around the point where Ynyr was climbing across the spiderweb is when my memories of this movie started to pop up. And now that I've seen the whole movie from start to finish, I can say that the movie was actually pretty good. It's not great, mind you, but I still found some enjoyment out of this movie.

So anyway, let's go ahead and start this review off here by first talking about the writing. Now, for those of you who might be reading this for the first time, a long time ago, I reviewed another fantasy movie called "Legend". It was a movie that tried to be so much more than what it was, but instead, it ended up being a very safe, by the numbers, fantasy film. Where it doesn't really do anything new or different with the genre that it's working with, and it had a lot of elements that you've seen in other fantasy stories at the time. And character wise, there wasn't really anything interesting about any of the characters in that movie with the one lone exception being Tim Curry's character, whom was also the main villain of the film. Otherwise, though, the movie really just decided to be a standard fantasy movie for the sake of being a standard fantasy movie of it's time.

Now with that said, that brings me to this movie. Because while this movie is another fantasy story that you've seen done before, what helps this one more revolves around a couple of things. For one, the pacing in this movie is mostly really solid. Despite the movie being close to 2 hours long, it mostly just speeds on by. Especially the first hour, because that flies by really quickly. The second hour also does go by pretty quickly as well, however, I do believe by the last 15 minutes or so, it does start to drag itself out a little bit. But even so, guys, this is probably one of the better paced movies I've seen in quite a while. It's still not the best paced movie, but compared to a few other movies I've seen for this series, that's actually saying quite a lot, really.

Now, the other thing that helps this movie is the characters. Because unlike "Legend", where you had only one likable character there, this one actually has a lot more characters here where they actually take a little more time in help making them likable. If I had to narrow it down, I would say Ynyr, Ergo, Torquill, and the Cyclops are the most likable characters of our group. I would also include our main character, Colwyn, however, he's more on the white meat babyface side of things, which makes him come across as being a little generic. However, despite him being a little generic, he is still at least likable. Now mind you, there are some characters who don't really get much of a spotlight in terms of whom you'll care about. Such as most of Torquill's bandits, which also includes Liam Neeson, as he does play one of the bandits. The princess, Lyssa, is quite easily the most forgettable character of the entire movie because she's not in the movie long enough for her to stand out. For the most part, she's trying to find her own way out of the Black Fortress, which doesn't really matter, because she never escapes it on her own.

If there is any minor problems I could pull from this movie, I would probably say it has to do with the Black Fortress's gimmick. You see, we're told around the beginning of the movie that the Black Fortress always moves to a different location each day. It's not sitting in one place. Which then leads into our heroes, who are trying to find someone who can help them locate where the Black Fortress is going to appear next so that they can get there and rescue princess. And my main question out of all this is why does the Black Fortress have to move itself to a different location? I'm not sure if there *was* a reason for it. The only thing that we're told by Ynyr is that the Black Fortress never goes back to it's original location after teleporting to a new location each day. It's never really explained why it does this, or what the reason is for this. My guess is that they don't want our heroes to find the fortress so easily so that they can never get to it. I understand it's not much of a reason, but it's at least better than the lack of reasoning this movie doesn't give out.

But still, despite that, the writing here is mostly pretty good. Our characters, like I said earlier, are mostly likable. Granted, you're not going to care about certain ones, like most of the bandits, but still, there is enough here to where you can find a likable character that you can care about. Which is more than what I could say about the cast of "Legend" because, well, they didn't really have a lot of likable protagonists that you could care about. This movie at least tries to make you care about the ones that you know are gonna be the focus on. And for the most part, it does a pretty decent job in making you care about them. Which is definitely a plus in my book.

Now because we have a pretty decent cast of likable characters, naturally, you would expect the acting to also be pretty good. Again, though, the only exception to all this is the actress playing our captive princess. Apart from her not having a lot of scenes in this movie, she's also pretty damn bland. Which also contributes to her terrible acting. Like I mentioned earlier, none of her dialogue sounded natural at all. She sounds very one notish and doesn't really have a whole lot to work here. I think if the script actually had more for her to work with, I think her performance in this film would've improved tenfold. Unfortunately, with what little she's given here, her performance does hinder here, which makes her the worst actress in the entire movie. The rest of the acting though is pretty solid, though, because they were given more material to work with. And even though Liam Neeson plays a very minor character here, he was still able to make it work despite the lack of screen time that he gets. Which is more than what I could say about our damsel in distress princess, but, then again, Liam Neeson can usually put on a good performance most of the time. So yeah, guys, the acting here, minus our princess, is generally pretty good.

Special effects in this movie are fantastic. At least, for the time when this movie came out. See, a lot of the effects in this movie are very reminiscent to what you would see in the first "Star Wars" movie. Now I didn't mention this beforehand, but this movie is technically more of a sci-fi fantasy film, rather than just a standard fantasy movie I described at the beginning of this review. In fact, those Slayers I mentioned way early on, they kinda look Darth Vader costumes, and they also carried swords that also acted as laser beams. In essence, they're basically Stormtroopers, only actually more competent, and they can land their targets. And also, the way they are killed is rather fucked up, too. But anyway, the costuming on those guys looked really cool. The suitwork involving our Beast, which you don't see much of and is also the main villain of the movie, looked pretty cool, too. It's just kind of a shame that he is incredibly forgetful. Still though, the costuming here is really good. The green screen effects, while a little obvious-looking at times, is still pretty good for what it is. Now if I were stupid enough to compare these effects to today's standards, I would say that they're kinda cheap and shitty. However, you would have to be a complete retard to compare the effects of 1983 to today's standards. And for 1983 standards, they're mostly great. And that also includes the makeup effects, too, what few there were anyway.

Camerawork here is really good. Lighting here is lit really well. The sound-mixing here is great. The music here is also very good, too. The score was composed by James Horner, and Horner's is usually really solid most of the time. And this movie is no exception. The music here fits the fantasy mood of the movie, and it does a good enough to make the movie stand out in it's own way.

So, with all that said, guys, when it comes down to it, can I recommend "Krull"? For the most part, yes. Especially if you're someone who's into fantasy movies. And if you want to watch something that has a little bit of sci-fi flare to it, then by all means, go ahead and check it out. It is definitely one of the better fantasy movies I have seen in a little while. Now does that mean that I'm going to add this movie to my ever growing DVD collection? Unfortunately, I don't think so. See, while I did enjoy this movie, I don't think it's gonna be worth watching a second time for me. It's fine for what it is, but considering the other fantasy films I already have on DVD, this is one that I'm probably one I'm not gonna be rewatching anytime soon because I would rather any of the other fantasy films like "The Last Unicorn", "The Flight of Dragons", or even Ralph Bakshi's attempt at "The Lord of the Rings". Granted, I know this may seem bias, because I'm picking animated films over a live-action movie. And it has nothing to do with the mediums. It's just, when compared to the stories in those movies over this one, I just don't see myself rewatching this film again over the others. But still, it is a pretty good movie. And if you find yourself watching this movie on multiple viewings, then hey, more power to you. It's just, for me, I don't see that happening for this film. So now, I'm gonna go and rewatch one of those movies I just mentioned. I'm probably just gonna start with "The Last Unicorn". Because that, to me, is still my favorite fantasy movie of all time. So I'm gonna start with that, and work my way up to the other films I already mentioned.

Anyway, guys, with that we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all later. Peace.

Reaction & Review | Held

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, guys, I'm gonna be checking out a horror film from 2020. That movie is "Held".

Now, I would love to tell you everything I know about this movie, guys, but unfortunately, I don't really have much to go on. What I can tell you guys is that the plot to this thing is about a married couple, who's marriage has been on the rocks, are trapped by this stranger inside a vacation rental, who holds them hostage and has to obey their every word. And this apparently gets our two main characters to get their act together and try to figure a way out of their dangerous situation.

Now while I will say that it does sound like an interesting premise, I do have to question something, because, as I had just stated, our estranged couple are trapped inside a vacation rental home or motel. And my question is that if their marriage is in trouble, why are they taking a vacation together? I'm only asking this because, normally, I would assume that they would've talked to a guidance counselor and work their troubled marriage from there. I wouldn't think that going on vacation together would be the first thing I do if I were in an estranged relationship. But then again, I have never been married, and I probably shouldn't be questioning this in the first place. However, I do hope the movie clarifies this explanation in some way. Otherwise, I'm just gonna be left confused as all hell.

But hey, you know what? This movie could still be decent here. I'm hoping that it's still gonna be an entertaining sort of film. But I won't know for sure yet, unless I shut up and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "Held".

16 minutes later

So, guys, we're almost 20 minutes into the movie and nothing has happened. And I'm not kidding either, *nothing* has happened. I'm hoping maybe this film will pick up sooner, rather than later. I'm also hoping for the acting to get better, too, because the acting from our two main leads so far is pretty terrible. This movie is not off to a strong start here.

16 minutes later

So let me if I understand this. This entire scheme of our main characters trapped inside this rental home, and the person who's doing this, is to essentially try and force them to be a happy couple or something against their will. At least, that's what I'm getting at so far from this movie. And if that *is* the case, then that's honestly a really stupid plan. And how exactly this person got all of Barrett's information about "what they did" is another thing altogether. I'm hoping that some of this is going to make some semblance of sense, otherwise, I'm just gonna be left baffled and totally confused by this whole concept.

9 minutes later

OK, I have a big question here. So, Henry, the husband, has found out from some information on this laptop, set up by our captor, that Emma, the wife, has been cheating on him with another dude named Ryan. And, of course, Henry's pissed that Emma wasn't telling him the truth. That part, honestly, doesn't bother me too much. What does bother me, however, is how exactly this person who's trapped them here set this whole thing up to begin with? Because I'm sure the person had to have gone to some great lengths to get all their private information, find the perfect place to set this whole thing up, I mean, they had to have planned this shit in advance. And I'm also wondering that if any part of it didn't go exactly as planned from the captor's point of view, then this whole plan would've been fucked right from square one. I'm sorry, guys, but the more that I pick this story apart, it starts to suck and it starts to suck hard! And I still have about less than an hour to go, and I'm not really sure if it's actually going to get any better.

12 minutes later

So now the Uber driver who took Emma to this house to begin with is now either dead or incapacitated by the same person with the leather mask. The same person who also, again, trapped our estranged couple inside their vacation home. And I probably would care about the plight of our main characters, however, this movie really hasn't given me much of a reason to care about them, so far, because they're both still boring as shit and, at this point, I'm not having much faith in this movie getting any better.

10 minutes later

All right, so now, Emma just killed Ryan. You know, the guy who she was having an affair with over her husband. How the fuck this captor knows about where Ryan lived and how he brought him over to the vacation home is another thing altogether. Seriously, guys, I really hope that this movie actually attempts to explain something about how our captor was able to do all this. Otherwise, if *anything* gets left unanswered by the time this movie finishes within the next half hour or so, I'm gonna be a bit pissed.

11 minutes later

So, guys, I've finally got an answer to all of my questions. Well, most of them anyway. I still don't know who's behind that mask. However, I know the basics of the origin behind this whole scheme to begin with, and it's kinda stupid, really. I'll just leave it at that for now.

The Review

Well, guys, that was "Held". Let me shut the movie off here...OK. Well...where to begin with this one? Um...well, I guess it's not really a shocker when I tell you that this movie sucks, guys. It really is a bad movie. Is it the worst I've seen so far this year? No, not even by a long shot does this movie reach that milestone. However, that's not giving this film much praise here, as it's certainly far from interesting, or even entertaining in the slightest.

Why don't I just forgo all the nonsense here and just go straight into it. I'm gonna start with writing. And the first thing I need to bring up is the plot twist that this movie has. Now, it's gonna be a little bit of a challenge here to talk about this without having to spoil anything. I will say this much, without giving away anything, that it sorta telegraphs the plot twist about halfway into the movie. And it's during the long scene where our estranged couple is forced to have sex with each other by the person who's commanding them to do this. I'll talk about more the captor later. However, as I just said, they telegraph this twist about halfway through the movie, and it's not really even much of a twist, even when after you eventually discover it through Emma's lens. And also the motivation for it is both really stupid and, well, it reinforces my point from way early on that they really could've just seeked counseling. How much of an effect it would've had is left up to interpretation, but still. Regardless, the twist is not really much of a twist. And as for who's behind the leather mask is also kind of stupid as well, though at least that one is less obvious than the actual twist this movie provides.

Now beyond the plot twist, the premise actually did have some promise. The problem here is that it's not executed very well. In fact, it's more boring than anything else. Because throughout most of the middle of the film, it's just our estranged couple, Emma and Henry, being forced to do things that a husband and wife would normally do. Such as the wife cooking dinner, and while the husband opens the door for her while she says thank you. And, of course, you have that point in which Henry discovers his wife had an affair with Ryan, and he gets pissed at her for not telling the truth. All of that could've been really interesting, but instead, it sorta just drags on itself for a while and it doesn't really pick up until the plot twist is actually revealed about a third into the film. And I will give credit to this movie for actually trying to be interesting during it's latter half. Unfortunately, everything before that is just really dull and boring as hell. On top of that, this movie also teaches you a valuable lesson not to invest in smart houses, seeing as how our captor is able to view our couple at all times with the cameras set around the house and is able to talk to them at anytime. But then again, I never found value in a smart house anyways, outside of security reasons.

Speaking of, let's talk about our main characters, Emma and Henry. This is the couple that you're supposed to care about and hopes that they'll be able to make it out alive from their situation. However, you're not really gonna care about either one of these characters because they're both boring as hell, and have no real personality to their characters. And it's not like I can pick out any distinct features or anything unique about them here because they're both in the same camp of boring, dry, and uninteresting characters. I can't even say anything positive about the masked captor who holds them hostage because that person really doesn't have very many scenes, even when they unmask themselves afterwards. So ultimately, you can write off these characters as unimportant. Unless you want to factor in the plot twist, but even so, these characters just don't have any interesting personalities or depth to make you want to keep watching this movie.

So yeah, guys, the writing in this movie is just bland and terrible. The premise itself had some promise, but was obviously poorly executed. And while I'm on the subject of our main couple, let's talk about their acting. Since it's mostly focused on them, you gotta suffer through most of their terribly wooden acting. Almost none of it sounds natural in any way, and none of their acting improves while the film is going on. The only actor I could probably say turns in a halfway decent showing is the guy doing the intercom voice from the smart house. But then again, it's mostly just a synthetic monotone voice, so I can't really judge much of it as either being good or bad. And also, the voice is from the same guy who directed and produced the film, Travis Cluff. I can't really say much about his acting skills, but I can say at least he made a pretty terrible movie here. So, congrats, dude, you certainly took an interesting premise and turned it into shit. But aside from him, the acting in this movie is just not very good at all.

Special effects in this film is probably one of the few positives I can give this movie, because even though the film was most likely working with a low budget, the effects here are actually pretty good. You have your standard blood effects, which are certainly decent. The most interesting effect is when you see Emma pull some electronic signal from her ear and it is pretty gruesome. Still though, it was a really good effect, probably the best one in the entire movie. And I will also say our sets, AKA the smart house, is a nice looking house at least. Granted, I would obviously never live there, but at least it's nice to look at. Which is all it is. So yeah, the special effects here are pretty good, and the smart house looks fine as well.

Camerawork here is pretty good. Lighting here is lit very well. The sound-mix here is good. The score here is just OK. None of it is great, as it's mostly generic, but, at least, it sorta gets the job done.

So with all that being said, guys, when it comes to down it, am I able to recommend "Held"? No. I really can't find much of any reason to recommend this movie to you guys, unless if you want to riff on it with friends on a bad movie night. But beyond that, there's really not much else I can say is worth watching here. The premise itself could've worked better, but ultimately, it didn't. The acting here is mostly terrible. And even though the special effects are pretty good, it's not enough for me to say that you should go check this movie out right now. It's really not that interesting. Also, I probably should've mentioned this way early on before I started watching the movie, the title is also incredibly generic, too. The only reason why I even bothered with this movie was because I was able to read the synopsis on the back of the DVD case. And while it sounded interesting to me at the time, it's not enough for me to keep around after watching it. So yeah, I think it goes without saying that I'm not gonna be rewatching this movie ever again. So, with that in mind, I'm gonna go and watch a better horror movie. I'll probably just marathon the first two "Wishmaster" movies because I need to watch something better after having to deal with this crap.

So anyway, guys, with that, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all later. Peace.