Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, guys, I'm gonna be covering a horror movie from 1998. That movie is John Carpenter's "Vampires".
Yes, guys, I'm finally doing another film from John Carpenter. And I'd love to tell guys everything I know about this movie, but really, the only things I can tell you that I know of is that it stars James Woods, as he an a bunch of other vampire hunter mercenaries are tasked to take down vampires. I think that, by itself, is enough for you guys to know what I'm getting myself into here.
Now I'm hoping for this one to be good. And, so far, I've enjoyed the few films I've seen from Mr. Carpenter so far, and I'm hoping this one will be the same. But the only way I'm gonna find out if this movie is actually any good at all is if I shut up and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "Vampires".
4 minutes later
OK, I have a really dumb question here, and I know it's very trivial to be asking this, but how long were those people sitting in the back of that truck? And I should note that, outside of a few lightbulbs, there's no other light inside the back of that truck. If they were inside there for hours, then I gotta imagine that it would be a *very* uncomfortable ride what with them all packed together in there. Again, I know it's very trivial and bullshit, but it's just something that came to me is all.
11 minutes later
All right, I have another dumb question here. Well, kinda two questions, really, but I'll save the other one for later. So, our team of vampire mercenaries have killed at least 9 vampires from this one house. Which is cool and all, but how does James Woods know which one is the master? He says it's not at this house, which means that this "master" probably has vampires hidden all over wherever the fuck this movie takes place in. I'm just asking, cause, you know, I really am curious.
6 minutes later
So I'm guessing this is suppose to be this "master" that James Woods was referring to earlier, and he just sliced one of the mercenaries nearly in half with his fingers. That's certainly pretty cool. Granted, I'm curious as to how and why he's even here, but I suppose, for now, I'll let the movie try and explain that for itself.
7 minutes later
Wait, so Jack's partner is stealing a car from some passerby that was about to fill his tank with gas. And instead of actually letting him fill up his car first, he instead says "much obliged" and drives away with it. You know, dude, you could've waited first to actually let the poor guy fill up his tank before you take it away. Because I guaran-damn-tee you that they won't get very far. Just saying.
18 minutes later
You know, guys, I'm really liking James Woods character here. He's really funny, but he's actually pretty smart, too, seeing as how he knows more about these vampires than anyone else. Well, maybe his team knew as well, but since they're all dead, I guess that makes hims the sole survivor of this knowledge.
17 minutes later
Well, guys, I think it's safe to say by this point that Jack certainly is not fucking around. He will get his information from people in his own way no matter what secrets they're holding. That is certainly something to know, guys.
The Review
Well, guys, that was "Vampires". Let me go ahead and shut the movie off here...OK. Well, before I talk about the movie itself, I am gonna let you guys know that I did enjoy this movie. Now, do I think it's as good as the other films I've seen from Mr. Carpenter? Not really, no. In fact, I would probably say it's one of his weaker films. Now when I say it's weak, I'm not saying that it's bad. Far from it, it's still a pretty good movie. However, I would say it's almost on par with "Escape from L.A." as one of Carpenter's weaker films. At least to me, it is.
Let's start this review off here by first talking about the writing. Now I did state at the start of this thing that this film was about James Woods leading a team of vampire hunters to track down and kill other vampires. And that does happen, at least in the beginning of the film anyway. Shortly after that, however, most of his team ends up being dead by Valek, the main vampire of this movie, also known as a master, according James Woods character Jack. And without going into too many details here, Valek's main goal is that he wants to find an ancient relic called a "Black Cross" and he wants to use it as part of an exorcism that was used on him that wasn't fully completed 600 years ago so that he can live and walk in the sunlight like humans do. How exactly he does all this I won't spoil, however, I will say that, at times, the story can be a little stupid, such as when Montoya, Jack's partner, gets bitten by Katrina, who ends up getting bitten by Valek way early on, and he never told Jack that he had gotten bitten until right at the very end of the film. Though I don't know if that was intended as a sequel hook or not, which, by the way, this film never got a sequel. Which is a bit of a shame, really, but I'm not gonna harp on that too much.
Now I will say that the story structure here is very similar to a lot of the old Western films that I use to watch as a kid. And watching this movie, you can definitely get that vibe here, as it pretty much plays itself out as a Western film. Only this one has vampires. In fact, now that I think on it, "Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust" was also a Western film in of itself. And that film was amazing. So I guess maybe the formula for a decent vampire hunter movie would be to have it set as a Western. At least, that's my theory on that anyway. And while I'm still on this subject, like with a lot of Westerns, that means that the pacing here would also be slower, right? Well, seeing as how this is a John Carpenter film, most of his movies that I've seen have had really tight pacing. And for the most part, this movie is no exception. However, if I really had to nitpick the pacing at all, I would say the last 15, maybe 20 minutes or so did show signs of slowing down a little bit. But I'm not gonna ding the pacing here for that alone because the pacing is still very good overall.
Our characters here are very likable. Well, at least in terms of our main characters anyway. Valek, unfortunately, is pretty damn bland as our main villain, and he really doesn't have much of a personality to speak of. Which, for a main villain, that's pretty sad. As for our main protagonists though, Jack is easily the best character in the entire film. Because the guy will shit talk you down and get the information that he needs, but he can also be really funny at times, even when he's shit-talking you. It's great stuff. But then again, he is played by James Woods, though I'll talk more about that when I get to acting. But yeah, same goes for Montoya, even though he can be kinda stupid, especially when he starts to fall for Katrina, even though she's slowly turning into vampire and, well, I kinda already spoiled how that potentially ends. But still, the guy's pretty good in a pinch. And so is Padre, too. He can be kind of annoying when you first meet him, but he does eventually mellow out and start to help out Jack when things really get intense.
Overall, guys, the writing here, while not as strong as it is in other films by John Carpenter, is still pretty good on it's own standards. Which is still a lot better than being shit. And as for the acting, well, it's actually really good. Every actor here turns in a great showing. Especially James Woods. The man is a natural on camera and seems to be having a great time with his role. I'm also going to give special mention to the actress playing Katrina because there's a scene in this movie where she ends up crying, but doesn't physically sob or anything. It's actually really good because, normally, when you have to do crying scenes, a lot of it sounds really fake and terrible. But here, she actually does shed a tear, and it does look very genuine. Granted, it is a small thing, but I do like it when actors have to go the extra mile when putting in small details like that to their acting skills. So yes, guys, the acting here from the entire cast is really good.
Special effects are also mostly really good. A lot of it you see is from the practical effects when it comes to blood. There is a lot of that in this movie, and if you've seen previous efforts from John Carpenter, then you should know what to expect because the blood effects here are fantastic. There is also some usage of CG here as well, and it's mostly decent save for one shot where James Woods is firing his gun at a vampire while on the ground, and he's firing the gun at a downward angle. And at one point, you actually get to see the gun up close, however, when you do so, you only get to see flashing white lights each time the gun goes off, meaning that you never see the gun recoil. And that shot there was horrible. It probably would've been less noticeable if that close up shot didn't exist. But it did, and it was completely terrible. That aside, the effects here for everything else are amazing. Costuming is also really good, too. Makeup effects are also pretty solid as well, as most of them you get to see involves our vampires. The only questionable thing I have to wonder is if the hair on Valek's head is genuine or just a wig. If it's the latter, then I have to ask why? Is it because he wouldn't look scary enough without it? I understand it's a very trivial thing to be commenting on, but still, it's just something that I kinda noticed is all.
So anyway, special effects in this movie are mostly really good. Camerawork here is also good. Lighting is also fine. The sound-mixing here is top notch. And the music here is also pretty good, as it was done by John Carpenter himself. And, again, similar to what I talked about in regards of this thing feeling like a Western, the music also accompanies that, too. At least, in quieter scenes you do. Everything else is sort of a mixed bag when it comes non-Western music, but at least it gets the job done. So you can take that for what it's worth.
Ultimately, guys, when everything is said and done, can I recommend "Vampires"? If you're a fan of John Carpenter's movies and you also are a fan of vampires, then I would say this film is totally worth checking out. Now again, to me, this film is nowhere near as good as any of his other movies that I've seen beforehand, but it's still pretty entertaining for the most part. I'm not entirely certain if it's gonna improve on repeat viewings for me, but I may end giving this film another viewing or so before I decide whether or not to keep it or trade it in at some point. But still, I did enjoy this movie enough for you guys to recommend. Which is always a big positive to me. Now, I'm gonna go and watch another movie involving vampires, and, well, I do really want to watch "Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust" again. Because that film is fucking fantastic, and it's that time of the month anyways, so I may as well go see it now as soon I get done here. But anyway, I can totally recommend John Carpenter's "Vampires" to you guys.
And with that, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all later. Peace.
