Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, guys, I'm finally gonna conclude this run of the "Critters" franchise by taking a look at the 4th entry that came off the combo pack that I bought. This movie came out in 1992. That movie is "Critters 4".
Now, if I had to summarize my thoughts on the "Critters" franchise as a whole, I think they've all been pretty good. Even though all of them are kinda, sorta flawed, I still really enjoyed watching these movies. And unlike the "Phantasm" series where each film's quality lowered, this is one franchise where I can forgive it's flaws because they're still very entertaining as a whole. So yeah, I've enjoyed watching the first 3 "Critters" movies.
Which then brings me to the fourth entry here. Now I would love to tell you guys that I'm really looking forward to watching this movie, however, part of me is going into this one with a bit of caution. You see, for those of you who may not know, when it comes to a 4th sequel in your film franchise, especially a horror movie franchise, it's usually the turning point in which the movies start to show their decline in quality. To give you guys some examples, "Wishmaster 4" was absolutely terrible and also ended up killing the franchise as a whole. And as I sorta mentioned a moment ago, "Phantasm IV" also suffered a great decline in quality with it's storytelling and is easily the weakest film in that franchise, at least for me it is.
So, going into this 4th "Critters" movie, I'm sorta going into this one with low expectations. Because this is obviously the 4th entry in it's series, I'm not expecting this thing to "wow" me in the slightest. However, I'm still kinda looking forward to watching this thing. Because I enjoyed the previous 3 movies, and this one could actually surprise me somehow and wind up being genuinely decent. I don't know if it will, though. The only way I'm gonna find out if I end up liking this movie or not is if I shut up and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "Critters 4".
20 minutes later
Sorry, guys, for not saying a whole lot right now, but this movie hasn't really given me a whole lot to work with so far. I'm hoping things will pick up sooner rather than later, but right now, this movie's off to a rather slow start.
7 minutes later
You know, guys, out of all the things I was expecting while watching a "Critters" movie, I wasn't really expecting someone peeping into a shower while watching someone bathe at the same time. It's kinda sorta creepy, and also, the captain himself has become rather unlikable, so I'm hoping maybe-oh, well at least he got decked by the woman who was showering, so at least that's something. Anyway, I'm hoping he'll get massively murdered by the Krites at some point in this movie, because he kinda deserves it.
11 minutes later
OK, well, I've never seen a Krite get inside of a human's mouth before. Well, it's technically halfway into Rick's mouth, but still at least's something kinda unique, so I gotta give them that much.
17 minutes later
O...K...I literally have no idea what the fuck I'm looking at, guys. This thing looks like a...hand monster, I think, with an ugly-looking face. Seriously, guys, I have no idea the hell that thing is suppose to be. It looks kinda nasty and a little bit fucked up.
19 minutes later
So that's what a Krite looks like as a baby...interesting. Usually, they're really hairy creatures, but this one's just all skin and teeth, apparently. You learn something new every day, don't ya?
The Review
Well, guys, that was "Critters 4", and let me go ahead and shut the film off here...OK. God, um...where to start with this one...? Well, I can safely confirm one thing to you guys. Out of all 4 of the "Critters" movies that I have seen in this series, this one is easily the weakest entry of the entire series. I kinda had a feeling that it wasn't going to be as good as the previous 3 movies were, but I was still hoping for it to be at least halfway decent. Unfortunately, that's probably asking for a bit much here.
Why don't we go ahead and start this review off proper here. Let's start with the writing. And the first thing that I want to touch upon is the movie's tone. See, the previous 3 movies in this series were aiming to be lighthearted comedies. And they worked, because, as I mentioned beforehand, these movies were aiming to cash in on the success of the 'Gremlins" movies. And what's similar between them and the first 3 "Critters" movies was that they were mostly horror comedies. They leaned in on having some dark moments, but not to a point where they couldn't have some fun with themselves. And that's what mostly held those first 3 movies together, because the writing was very solid, even with some minor flaws here and there. I just was able to overlook those flaws, because the writing was just strong enough to where they wound up being very entertaining creature movies.
So, where does this 4th movie go from here? Well, first of all, this movie goes in a completely different direction with it's tone. Essentially, guys, this movie is a straight-up Sci-fi horror movie, and is also the darkest film of the entire series. Now, I honestly wouldn't have much of a problem with this, if the writing itself was actually interesting. Unfortunately though, that's not the case. In fact, this movie falls into the same trap as "Starship Troopers 2" did. Where it tried to be an interesting Sci-fi horror movie, but instead ended up being really boring and poorly written as well. Not only that, but the pacing in this movie is dogshit. It takes 40 minutes for the actual Krites to show up in the movie. And by that point, there's only about an hour of film left. Not only that, but the kills have all been spaced out. You have the first kill by the time the Krites first show up, then 20 minutes later comes another kill, and then almost another 15-20 minutes after that comes the third kill. I have not seen pacing this bad since I watched the "Tomb Raider" movie from 2018. That's usually a bad sign when your movie almost rivals the horrible pacing of the 2018 "Tomb Raider" film.
Now since I mentioned this film being really boring, let's go a little bit more into the plot, shall we? Now being that this is the 4th entry in the "Critters" series, where do you go from here? Well, unlike the 3 previous movies where they were all set terrestrially, this one goes into space. Which, considering that we learned that they originally came from space in the first movie, this is honestly a welcome change. And they actually kinda show the last few minutes of the 3rd movie where Charlie got a signal from his ally and comrade Ug, who was the bounty hunter from the first 2 movies, telling Charlie that a capsule pod will come and that Charlie is suppose to put the eggs into the capsule so that they can contain and preserve the last two Krite eggs to exist. Unfortunately for Charlie, he ends up slipping into the capsule and is launched into space along with the eggs, and is cryogenically frozen in time until the year 2045 until his pod ends up being discovered by a space crew of humans, along with the eggs that later hatch.
And as for our space crew, as I already mentioned, they end up on an abandoned space colony where they're instructed by Ug, who contacts them after they contain the capsule, and tells them to wait there and do not disturb the pod until they get there, which would be in a couple of hours. And, like I also mentioned, the eggs hatch as the asshole space captain decides to force open the capsule, which causes him to die by the newly hatched Krites, and that's where we finally have our plot. At least, that's what I *would* say, but unfortunately, like I already talked about, the film's pacing is incredibly slow, and because of which, hardly anything of interest happens here. Which is sad to say, because you would think that a plot which involves a space crew being trapped with a couple of loose Krites on a space colony would sound really interesting. But no, they decided to become a really boring, slow, and shallow movie.
Speaking of which, our characters also follow the same suit. In terms of our space crew, there is not a single likable character of the entire cast that I could name is even worth caring for. You have the asshole captain, Rick, who dies pretty early on, thankfully. You have Bernie, who's basically an idiot. You have Fran, who's the only woman of the entire crew and also has the personality of dried-up paint. You also have Al Bert, and yes that's how his name is spelled, who's kinda, sort of the nerd of the group. And finally, you have Ethan, a normal guy who really just wants to get back to Earth. I would ask why this crew was even in space to begin with. I mean, it's not like Earth was blown up or anything. But honestly, that's probably me trying to dig into a movie that doesn't really apply much to logic.
The only character left I can mention is Charlie, because he's the only character who's in all 4 of these movies, and I will say that, unlike his appearance in "Critters 3", he actually has more to do here since he gets a little bit more screen time. And honestly, he's still the only likable character here. But then again, he actually had some resembling development throughout the previous 3 movies. And I have a feeling that if he wasn't in this movie, and it was just our generic space crew, then this movie would've just been a really bland, boring, sci-fi horror movie. Probably more so than it is now, but who can say? I could also mention more about Ug, however, I'm gonna try not to spoil anything regarding him, because it's something that I'm not too happy with, personally. Let's just put it at that.
So yeah, guys, the writing here is definitely the weakest of all 4 of the movies here. There's almost nothing about the writing that I could say is even worth mentioning in a positive way, other than having Charlie back again. But that's not saying very much, honestly. With that said, let's get into the acting here. I will say, surprisingly, that the acting here is actually pretty decent. You have Don Keith Opper reprising his role as Charlie for this 4th installment. And even our space crew, as bland and as shallow as they are, actually turn in a rather decent showing. I'm kind of surprised by that, honestly. Because usually, when you're given a script that is this poorly written, you wouldn't really expect the actors to make it work here. But they actually do, to an extent. It's still not great, but it's a lot better than phoning it in.
Special effects here are also pretty good, too. In fact, that's the one thing I can say that has mostly been a true positive about these movies is that the special effects have all held up pretty well. This movie is no exception. And I'm mostly referring to the puppeteering on the Krites themselves, along with the gore effects. Though they don't shoot spikes from their fur anymore, which is a little bit of a disappointment, admittedly. Still though, they at least still have their killing edge.
Camerawork here is OK, the lighting here is lit fine, the sound-mixed also mixed fine, and the score here is just very generic and completely forgettable. So yeah, when it comes to technical stuff, all of that is fine.
So ultimately, guys, when all is said and done, can I recommend "Critters 4"? Um...no, I can't. Even as someone who's enjoyed these movies, this fourth movie is just a massive disappoint. If you're really curious, you can buy the 4 pack that's on DVD or Blu-ray and check it out, though I would suggest you watch the first 3 movies before you consider watching the 4th movie. Though personally speaking, I would say just watch the first 3 movies and you can pretend that the 4th movie doesn't exist. Though that being said, I know there's technically a 5th movie, and if I somehow run into that one, I may eventually end up covering it for this series. Though I'm gonna try my best to avoid it, because after watching this 4th movie, I'm sorta dreading what this "reboot" might do to the franchise. But anyway, setting aside the possibility on covering the 5th movie, I can certainly recommend the 4 pack that's only worth it for the first 3 movies. So hey, 3 out of 4 ain't bad for this series. Now...I'm gonna go and watch something else. I don't know what yet, maybe I'll just rewatch the "Gamera" trilogy from the mid-90's. It's been a little while, and I just rewatched the first movie not too long ago, so I'll probably just dive right into the second movie and have fun with that.
Anyway, guys, with that, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all later. Peace.
No comments:
Post a Comment