Reaction & Review | Iron Man 3

Welcome, one and all, to "Tales of the Longbox" here on Reaction & Review. Tonight, ladies and gentlemen, I'm gonna be covering a movie from 2013. That movie is "Iron Man 3".

Now, a couple of years ago, back when I first did "Tales of the Longbox" for this series, one of the movies that I ended up reviewing was "Iron Man 2". Because while I had seen the first "Iron Man" movie many, many times, I never got around to watching the sequels. So, I decided to give "Iron Man 2" a shot. And after watching "Iron Man 2", I thought that the movie was...average, at best. It wasn't great, but it wasn't horrible either. And since reviewing "Iron Man 2", I had long since traded in my copy of that movie because it wasn't worth watching a second time.

Which then leads into the third installment of this franchise. And...I have very mixed feelings going into this movie. You see, I skipped out on watching this movie last year, mostly because I wasn't ready to cover it yet. Part of the reason was because "Iron Man 2" was incredibly average, at least to me. But the bigger reason why I haven't seen this movie yet is because of it's reception. I have heard nothing but mixed things about this movie. People have either said that this thing is a great movie, and that everyone who is a comic book fan should go and watch it. Others I've heard say that this movie is a huge disappointment. Or at worse, they'll say that the movie is a huge pile of shit. And that's mostly why I avoided it up until now. But you know what? Seeing as how this movie has been considered a mixed bag from a lot of people, that makes my job here much easier. Because now, I can finally go into this thing with a fresh viewing experience and find out how this movie deals with me.

Now, while I have made it pretty well known that I'm not a huge fan of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, I do admittedly have a soft spot for Iron Man. Because the first "Iron Man" movie still stands, at least to me, as the best movie from the MCU. And while "Iron Man 2" was incredibly average, I still kinda liked it. So, I figured, you know what? I guess it's finally time to see if this movie will end this trilogy on a high note. On a side note, however, I already know what happens to Tony Stark in future installments of the MCU, mostly "Avengers: Endgame". How do I know this? Because we live in an age where retards and dipshits have to go out of their way to dig through spoilers and leaks, so that way they can ruin it for everyone else because nobody has any real patience for anything anymore. Mind you, I had no interest in watching "Avengers: Endgame" to begin with, but still, fuck every one of them who does this. Those people are some of the worst on the internet.

Anyway, I guess I should finally stop stalling here and see if this movie is any good or not. Mind you, I'm not expecting this thing to be as good, or even better than the first "Iron Man" movie. But I am, at least, hoping for this movie to end this trilogy on a high note. And the only way I'm gonna find out how good or bad this movie could possibly be, is if I shut up, and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "Iron Man 3".

1 minute later

So, guys, do you happen to remember the previous two movies having awesome songs in their soundtracks? Well, this movie is starting off kinda poorly on that end with "I'm Blue". You know, that Euro-Pop song by Eiffel 65? Granted, I did like that song back when I was a child, but I eventually grew out of that song pretty quickly. And to have it start off an "Iron Man" movie of all things is almost making dread the rest of the soundtrack. Mind you, we still have the rest of the movie to go, so it has plenty of time to change that. But right now, this first impression of the soundtrack is not making me a fan of it.

20 minutes later

Well, guys, even though I don't have a whole lot to comment on right now, I will say that the dialogue banter in this movie, at least so far, is a hell of an improvement over "Iron Man 2". I'm hoping that it continues to be this way, because if it doesn't, then I'm gonna be sorely disappointed.

2 minutes later

Wow, I didn't even know that Iron Man suit was still operational, even after Tony was dicking around with it earlier on. I'm gonna tell you, guys, that there was a little bit creepy. I'm not gonna lie there.

12 minutes later

OK, that was sorta cool. I kinda liked how Stark was able to get an Iron Man suit onto Pepper through...magnetic force, I guess, before they collided on impact with a wall. That was sorta awesome.

16 minutes later

Christ almighty...guys, I'm already getting sick and tired of this fucking kid, Harley. I wish he would go the fuck away right now so I don't have to deal with his irritating ass for much longer. Just saying, not a huge fan of Harley at this point.

8 minutes later

OK, that was the funniest way you could tell off a kid who's guilt-tripping you. Hopefully, this will be the last we see of Harley, but I gotta say, I may actually have to try Tony's method one of these days in case an annoying kid ever tries to guilt-trip me. Just thought I'd share that with you, guys.

2 minutes later

All right, guys, I feel like now is the time to bring this up. I'm actually really liking what they're doing with the Mandarin here. Do you know what would make it more convincing? If his acting wasn't so wooden. Seriously, guys, this is some of the most stilted-wooden acting I've ever heard coming from the Mandarin. It's actually kinda sad when you really think about, too. And I'm gonna have to get use to his horribly-stilted acting from him throughout the rest of the movie. Who knows? Maybe I'll eventually get use to it. But somehow, I kinda doubt it.

17 minutes later

So, guys, I'm just learning about the Mandarin's origin...and I cannot begin to describe how utterly stupid this origin is. I really don't have any other words to describe it without spoiling it, but fucking hell, this origin sucks!

19 minutes later

You know, I was gonna make a snarky reference to Sonic Heroes, but I don't think anyone would get it. But I will say that I wasn't really sure that Stark's plan of having all the people that fell out from Air Force One catch each other like a barrel of monkeys was actually gonna work, but somehow, it actually did. I'm a little bit impressed by that, honestly.

The Review

Well, guys, that was "Iron Man 3". Let me go ahead and shut the movie off...OK. So...what the hell to even begin with? Well, I might as well get this question out of the way, first. Is this movie good? Yes. Compared to "Iron Man 2", this film stands head and shoulders above that movie with relative ease. In fact, I will go on record to say that this movie is almost great. Like, compared to the handful of movies I've seen from the Marvel Cinematic Universe, this thing certainly tops a whole hell of a lot of them. Now I will say that this movie will still never top the first "Iron Man" movie, because I am that biased towards it. But still, for what it is, it is a really solid movie.

Now that I've shown my hand a bit early, let's actually get into this thing by talking about the writing. And I want to start with a topic that I've brought up quite a few times beforehand, which is the movie's humor. If you're a new viewer reading this, one of my biggest complaints that I've had with the Marvel Cinematic Universe movies is the fact that they love to shoehorn in humor for a lot of their movies. Most of the time, it is completely unnecessary, and a lot of the humor just comes off as overly forced and not very funny. It was a problem I had with "Guardians of the Galaxy", for example. Because most of, if not all of the humor in that movie was just painfully unfunny. Especially towards the end of it, which I thought was fucking terrible, as well. It was also prevalent in "Iron Man 2", where the dialogue banter between characters was just awful, and almost none of it felt natural. And the biggest problem with the MCU's inclusion of humor is that almost none of it is balanced. Mind you, I've still only seen a handful of the MCU movies, but from just the few movies that I've seen, I almost never got a laugh out of any of them. The only ones that were able to do that were the first "Iron Man" and "Ant-Man" movies. But aside from them, almost every other movie I've seen falls flat on it's face when it comes to humor.

However, when it comes to "Iron Man 3", this movie is definitely taking it's story more seriously. And while the humor is still present here, it's mostly taking a backseat to the story. Which I definitely appreciate, because we definitely have a solid story here. The dialogue banter isn't too bad either, and I did legitimately get a laugh out of a couple of things from this movie. And that's fucking surprising, because I really didn't think I would get a laugh out of anything in this movie, but they actually managed to get the humor right. It's not overly forced, and there's almost never a time when any character has to shoehorn in a joke for the sake of humor. When it happens, it's mostly just one and done. This movie shows you how to do humor correctly, and I wish more movies, specifically the MCU movies, would take note on how you work in humor. Because this movie definitely nails most of it down. Now mind you, not every joke here is funny, but most of it still works. And that's a huge positive from me. Because if this thing tried to force itself to be humorous for no actual reason, then it would've brought this story down almost to a halt. Which was exactly what brought "Guardians of the Galaxy" down for me, but again, I won't try to make this a tirade against "Guardians of the Galaxy". My point is, the humor here mostly works well enough to a point where it doesn't interfere too much with the story.

As for the story itself, it's very solid and mostly well written. Like with "Iron Man 2", it continues the saga of Tony Stark. And I actually feel like they made progress with Stark here, because he started off as a guy who liked to party, to a guy who's taking his work seriously to a point where he actually ends up getting anxiety. And that kinda plays into a part of this movie, especially after his home gets destroyed, because he was stupid enough to give out his address to the Mandarin, who has been responsible for causing terrorism throughout the entire world. I'll talk more about the Mandarin in a bit, because I have quite a bit to say about him. But anyway, after Tony's home gets destroyed, he ends up somewhere in Tennessee, in which he befriends a kid named Harley, who tries to help him fix his suit. It's a bit of a long story there, which I won't get into here. And Tony's anxiety mostly kicks in, because he fears that he won't be able to protect Pepper, who might be in great danger. Admittedly, anxiety is the one thing that I didn't think Tony would ever have, but what do I know? I will also say that, without giving away spoilers, the movie also gives Tony Stark a proper ending. I believe that if this was the last movie to ever feature Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark/Iron Man, then I think that this film would've been a great end to a trilogy, and we would've given Tony a proper sendoff. Unfortunately, seeing as how Disney and Marvel Studios is still milking this tired Cinematic Universe, that obviously doesn't end up happening. And considering what happens to him in later installments thanks to retards spoiling everything, I'm not really missing a thing with what happens to him. So in my mind, this was a perfect ending to Tony Stark/Iron Man. And I'm gonna stick by that statement no matter what.

Now, since I spent that time talking about Tony Stark, let's get into the characters. Like I just said, Tony Stark is the one who gets the most development. But then again, he's had 3 movies to work with, so that definitely helps things. Pepper is mostly just the same character, with some minor adjustments here and there. Rhodey has taken the role of the Iron Patriot in this movie, and he actually ends up being the second-most likable character in this entire movie. Which then leads into the only other character worth mentioning, which is the film's villain, the Mandarin. Oh dear heavenly fuck, the Mandarin...now, when I first laid eyes upon him early on in the movie, I actually really liked what this movie was doing with him. In fact, it's something that I wanted the villain from "Iron Man 2" to be, but didn't end up happening. Because throughout a good portion of the first half of the movie, the Mandarin has been giving out threatening messages in a very terrorist-like fashion. And we see a bunch of towns and cities being blown up while Mandarin is continuing his speeches. And most of that was great. Because it felt like he was a genuine threat to the U.S., and you would be wondering how in the hell Stark would be able to combat this? Well, all of that gets kneecapped for two reasons. The first one being the origins of the Mandarin. My god, guys, I'm still not over on how badly the Mandarin was revealed here. I won't spoil it here for those who haven't seen this movie yet, but it is such a fucking disappointment, that it actually is the worst part of the entire movie. Granted, I understand that Iron Man's gallery of villains are kind of limited. The only ones I can think of are the Mandarin and Ultron. And I'm not gonna count Thanos, because he's more of a centric Marvel villain. Hell, I think of him more as a Deadpool villain, but that's just me, personally. Point is, this movie could've done something really cool with the Mandarin. And it was sorta cool at first, but then once you know more about him in this movie, well, it just leaves a bad taste in your mouth. That's all I'll say without giving away too much.

But since I'm still on the subject of the Mandarin, let's get into the second reason why the Mandarin ended up sucking in this movie. And that's gonna transition into me talking about the acting. Before I get into that, though, I will say that the writing here is mostly good, save for the stuff involving the origins of the Mandarin. And speaking of which, I can easily say that Ben Kingsley as the Mandarin fucking sucks in this thing. And it was right around the second speech in which I was able to pick up his acting, and, oh my god, it is terrible. It sounds horribly stilted and wooden, and it just comes off as very unnatural. And even with the reveal, his acting was still terrible. So really, you're gonna end up getting horrible acting from him in this movie no matter what. And the worst part about this is that the kid who plays Harley in this movie actually ended up turning a better showing than Ben Kingsley did. And that's kinda sad when a child actor was able to outdo a character that's suppose to be one of Iron Man's top villains. But regardless, Ben Kingsley turns in the worst showing in this entire movie. Everyone else, though, did a really awesome job. Most of the returning actors such as Robert Downey Jr., Gwyenth Paltrow, and Don Cheadle, reprise their roles, and they feel very natural in their roles, because they've been playing the same characters from the past 3 movies. Well, except for Don Cheadle, who took over as Rhodey in "Iron Man 2" after Terrance Howard didn't come back from the first movie. Now aside from the main cast, the supporting characters did a pretty decent job, too. In fact, almost everybody here turned in a really good showing, minus of course Ben Kingsley as the Mandarin. However, I've already said what I needed to say about the Mandarin, so I'll just leave it as is. The acting here is mostly really solid.

Special effects in this movie are fantastic. And I'm talking about everything involving CG, blue screens/green screens, and the Iron Man suits looking really cool, along with the Iron Patriot. But then again, this is a big budget film from Marvel Studios. So to have them fuck up on something that was already prevalent in the first two movies would've been a fucking crime if they had gotten anything wrong here in terms of special effects.

Camerawork here is great. The lighting here is lit perfectly fine. The sound-mix here is also perfectly fine. The score here is very typical and is something that you probably would've heard from the first 2 movies. However, that does lead into the only other big problem I had with this movie, which was the soundtrack. Because the past two movies had awesome rock music. While the first movie lacked a memorable soundtrack, it made up for that with an awesome score from the guy who did the music for "Pacific Rim". The second movie had music from Queen, AC/DC, and the Beastie Boys, to name several examples. And most of, if not all of the music for "Iron Man 2" was fantastic. I unfortunately cannot say the same thing about "Iron Man 3", which definitely has the weakest music. Now I should mention, first and foremost, that this movies takes place around Christmas time, and thus we get some Christmas music in this movie. And I would've been all for that, except they got a couple of remixes of classic Christmas songs that really suck. Mind you, I'm not a huge fan of Christmas music, but they could've gotten some Christmas music that actually sounded better. The only other song I can mention is "I'm Blue" by Eiffel 65, which plays only at the beginning of the movie. And unfortunately, that's the only licensed song that I can make note of. And it's a stark contrast when compared to the other two movies, considering that they had great rock music. And the only song that they could get here was some one-hit wonder song that was mostly relevant in the 90's and early 2000's. So yeah, the soundtrack for this movie is definitely the weakest of the 3 movies.

Overall, guys, when all is said and done, can I recommend "Iron Man 3"? If you liked the two previous movies, then yes. I can totally recommend it, especially if you're someone who's into Iron Man. It's a great movie to end the Iron Man trilogy, and you can easily find all of these movies pretty cheap. Whether it's on DVD, Blu-ray, or even Disney+, it's pretty easy to find all of these movies and give them a watch. So if you are one of those that are interested in getting into the Marvel Cinematic Universe, then I could easily recommend the "Iron Man" films as a start. Mind you, I'm basing this recommendation off the trilogy, and not what order of these movies that MCU fanboys will have you start as the start of Phase 1, 2, 3, or whatever. So, if you want to get into "Iron Man 3", then I would easily start with the first two movies first. And if you liked them enough, then you can go right into the third movie and probably have a great time watching it. As for myself, I am genuinely surprised by how good this movie really was. And unlike "Iron Man 2", I could actually see myself watching this again at some point. So yeah, I'm quite happy with how this movie turned out, and funnily enough, it's gonna be the third MCU movie that I'll own on DVD next to the first "Iron Man" and "Ant-Man" movies. And speaking of which, I kinda want to go and watch the first "Iron Man" movie again, because it is my favorite MCU film, and this movie made me interested in wanting to watch that movie again. So yeah, I'm gonna go and do that next after I'm done putting this review together.

Anyway, guys, with that, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all later. Peace.