Welcome, one and all, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, ladies and gentlemen, I'm gonna be checking out a horror anthology film from 1989. That movie is "Terror Eyes".
Now, I'm gonna be honest with you, guys, I know almost nothing about this movie. When I first discovered it a while back, probably about a half year ago, the first thing that caught my attention about it was the title. I just thought that title sounded kinda cheesy, yet sorta cute at the same time, what with it being a pun on the word "terrorize". So I put it on my backlog of movies to cover for this series, and I didn't think much else about it since.
But about a month or so back, my interest about it was caught again when I was figuring out what to cover after my 100th episode. So when I finally decided to look up the scant bit of information on this movie, the only things that I knew about it were it's title, and the fact that it was a horror anthology film. Now, I should mention that my history with anthology films have been very positive, because I haven't run into a bad anthology film as of yet. Most of my experiences with anthology films have come from animated movies. I'm talking about stuff such as "Memories", "Robot Carnival", and "Superman/Shazam!: The Return of Black Adam". The only live-action anthology film that I can recall seeing was "Chillerama". In fact, I kinda make it a habit to watch "Chillerama" every October around Halloween. So yeah, I really do enjoy anthology films, even though the list for them has been very short in my case.
And I can imagine, just based off the cover for this movie, that it's going to be a cheesy B movie. And as some of you probably know, I really enjoy B movies, so this thing could easily be on par with something like "Chillerama". I'm just hoping and praying that it's not gonna intentionally aim for that stupid title of 'so bad, it's good'. I just want it to be entertaining on a fun, cheesy level. And the only way I'm gonna find out if this thing is entertaining at all, is if I shut up, and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "Terror Eyes".
8 minutes later
You know, guys, I'm just gonna say this now. The acting, at least in this first story, is ridiculously wooden. And yet, at the same time...it's a little bit charming, as well. I'm kinda hoping that it's gonna make this story more interesting to watch.
4 minutes later
Whoa, wait a second, time out! Did this guy just say that this book, The Book of Life, was his book, even though he's NEVER written it? If that's true, then why are you making changes to a book that you don't technically own? I could maybe understand if it was his name that was on the front cover, and it was written by him, then it would make sense. But the very fact that he's wanting to change it, mainly for the ending, is a little bit strange to me.
10 minutes later
OK, you know what, as cool and as creepy as this is with our two main characters being, I guess, affected by the book's magic, I'm sorta curious as to what it meant when it said that Troy was gonna die due to self-inflicting pain? So far, this story hasn't really explained that, and I'm kinda hoping that it does by the time this story's over. Oh.....and Troy's face is now half-melted. I will say that the effects for it looked really good, especially for a low budget film. So, at least, there is that.
19 minutes later
Well, guys, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that we're finally getting to the second story of this anthology film. Bad news? It took the movie almost 20 minutes to get to this second story, especially considering that the movie itself has about less than 50 minutes to go. I'm beginning to question how bad the pacing really is for this movie. Certainly hoping that the second story is gonna make up for that lost time, but I fear that it might be too little, too late.
10 minutes later
So our second story is just some guy going through the same events again and again until he gets it right? Guys, I've seen this concept done better in an episode of "Power Rangers: Lightspeed Rescue". Here, it's boring as shit. At least, so far. Kinda hoping it gets better, but I'm not having much faith in that happening.
2 minutes later
Wait, so the guy who killed this loan shark's wife was standing in the dark the whole time waiting to shoot Mannie? Mind you, he was standing next to her dead body when this guy did this. Were they, like, waiting there for someone to discover them so that they can shoot whoever discovers the dead woman first? Is this mysterious person the one who is causing Mannie to go through the same events on repeat? Guys, I have so many questions about this second story, and I don't think it's going to offer an explanation for ANY of it. And that really bothers me.
7 minutes later
Thank Christ, that second story is fucking done. And I called that ending, too. That ending was predictable as shit!
6 minutes later
So this game company literally has a video game where you get awarded points for how many kills and rapes you get. You know what? After that bullshit second story, this is probably one of the more creative things I've seen this entire movie. It's weird and it's fucked up, but still, at least it's creative.
12 minutes later
You know, guys, I am rather shocked that this third story is ACTUALLY really interesting. I am really invested in what's going on here. I just wish all of this was in a better movie, and not stitched together in this lame, bullshit anthology film. It really saddens me to say that, but it's fucking true, guys.
The Review
Well, guys, that was "Terror Eyes". That ending was really fucking stupid. I'm just gonna shut the movie off...OK. Dear lord, where do I begin...? So, do you guys happen to remember my little comment earlier about how, before going into this movie, that I hadn't run into a bad anthology film as of yet? Well...I think I may have jinxed that pretty badly. Um...yeah, this movie sucked. Where the hell do I even begin?
Before I talk about the stories themselves, I'm gonna start with pacing. Now, as I stated before I watched this movie, I hadn't seen a whole lot of anthology films. But the one thing I noticed with all of the ones that I had seen is that they usually know when to get to the next story. When they want to get to point A to point B, they do it in a seamless fashion with almost no interruptions. Now, mind you, I'm basing that from the animated anthology films that I watched, but you get my point. I guess I should probably compare this with "Chillerama", since it's the only live-action anthology film that I've watched. Do you want to know the big difference between how "Chillerama" handles their story transitions and how "Terror Eyes" handles theirs? Well, the big difference is that "Chillerama" got to the fucking point. It didn't need to spend so much time trying to get to their second story. At most, it took about 5-10 minutes to get to the second story, and that was it. And they also had some interesting bits going on during those intermissions whenever they weren't showcasing their stories. Mind you, "Chillerama" wasn't a great movie, but it certainly was a fun movie at best. And, like I said, they knew when to get to the point. "Terror Eyes", however, takes almost 20 minutes to get to it's second story, and that is bullshit! Because between the ending of the first story, and the beginning of the second story, we have almost nothing going on throughout that time. All that happened was that our characters were getting together on this camping trip for the weekend, and they spend a good portion of that 20 minutes setting up their camp. It's just them doing that, and getting together around the campfire. Oh, and Eva's boyfriend, Richard, also leaves at one point to go and take a piss in the woods. And he "dies" after the devil kills him with his smoke. And if you're wondering why I put the quotations on the word 'die'...well, you're just gonna have to watch the film for yourself, because it ties in to that shitty ending. But anyway, after he "dies", the devil takes form of Richard's body, and he goes on this weird, WEIRD tangent about how Eva doesn't have an idea on what to write for her horror movie. By the way, this film's framing device is centered around Eva, our main character, trying to figure out what to write for her horror movie, thus is the reason why her friends are tossing out ideas based on their own stories. So that's where the framing device comes from. But seriously, the pacing in this movie is just horrible. And our characters are all pretty shallow and lifeless. However, for B movie standards, I can give some of that lack of character depth a pass here.
While I'm on the subject of pacing, I'm gonna talk about the worst story in this entire anthology film. And it's the second story, which is entitled "Perfect Alibi". Holy shit, this story is fucking garbage! And one of the big reasons why it's garbage is because of it's predictably. Right from the word go, I could tell you where this story was going to end up. So our main character, Mannie, is in trouble, because he needs to pay off some money to either his boss or a loan shark, the movie doesn't really explain who Mannie has to pay off. But anyway, he has instructions on how to get the money by cracking open a safe in which it holds valuable jewelry. He tries to do that, but ends up forgetting the combination, thus he's fucked. He then notices a woman in the next room, dead, and he takes off before the police could get there. And so he goes through this underground room that leads him back to the theater. And through some bullshit magic involving these mirrors he finds, it takes him back in time through the moments before he meets up with his boss at a bar. And from then on, the story ends up becoming this predictable garbage that I knew it was going to go. Guys, I haven't seen this much predictably since the last time I watched anything involving WWE's current product. Where they would end up booking their shit months in advance, and none of it comes as a real surprise, because you know the ending to it. And that's what I feel about "Perfect Alibi". There is nothing about this second story that is surprising or different. It's predictable and it's boring as shit, too. Like I said earlier, I've seen this concept of a character going through the same events on repeat done better in that one episode of "Power Rangers: Lightspeed Rescue". Mind you, it was predictable, but it wasn't boring, unlike this shit. And you know what? This second story wouldn't have been so bad, if not for two things. One, the story wasn't the same old predictable bullshit. And two, the fucking pacing wasn't absolutely horrible. How bad is the pacing for this story, you might ask? Well, it takes roughly 20 minutes to tell it's story. Which is funny, considering that it also took almost 20 minutes to get to this actual story. That's how horrible the pacing this story, and this movie, really is.
So, what about the other two stories for this anthology? How do they fare? Well, our first story, which was entitled "Book of Life", is about our two main characters receiving this book from some guy, who is a part of the Book of Life club. And this book contains every bit of detail about Troy and Starla's life from the past and future. About how they were married, and about how Troy was cheating on her with some other girl, and it even involves words that they have used, and are currently using. An example would be when Starla is reading words to Troy that he's currently saying to her such as "Put the book down", or how he calls her a stupid klutz, she also repeats that as well. And all of that would've been great...if we could actually see the contents of the actual book. But the movie doesn't do that, because we're just suppose to take these words from our main characters as if they're really repeating them from the book. So it comes across as being a little bit lazy. At least, to me, it does. Also, I find it kinda odd that Starla ends up pulling a 180 on the book when she's fascinated to know what their future holds, and then all of a sudden she is weirded out when the book explains how Troy will die by committing suicide. It's like, is she interested in the book or not? So, that also was a bit weird. The story itself had potential, but it still kinda fell flat for me. The third story, however, which is called "Snake Eyes" is actually really interesting. So, the third story involves our main character, Alex, getting trapped in a game world by our villain Mr. Rubinstein. And she has to go through these death-defying challenges within a very short amount of time before she dies. Basically, I want you to take the concept of the "Saw" movies and mix it up with "Arcade", and this is what you get. The only differences is that there are no traps that are on the same level as the ones from the "Saw" movies, and you're not necessarily trapped in a video arcade game like the one in "Arcade". And you know what the funny thing is? It was right towards the ending of "Snake Eyes" that I realized that the main character is named Alex, who also had the same name as our main character from the movie "Arcade". I just thought it was sort of a funny coincidence. However, I also have to remember that this movie came out a few years before "Arcade" did. I don't know if Charles Band got the concept of "Arcade" from this particular story when he was making that film, but it's not something that I'm going to think about too hard. Anyway, this third story was actually pretty good. It wasn't amazing, but it certainly was better than the other two stories that were a part of this anthology film. Unfortunately, 1 out of 3 stories is not a good batting average for any anthology film. At least, an anthology film with only 3 stories. Some have more than that, but that's beside the point. Point is, there's no way I'm gonna be watching this film again for that third story, because the other two stories were just that terrible, and the movie overall just sucked in general.
So, I may as well just state that the writing in this movie is just terrible. And that's saying a lot, coming from someone who likes B movies. Now, what about the acting? Well, I would say that the acting ranges from being wooden to rather hammy. And the hammiest performance comes from the actor playing Richard, AKA the devil. And he is just hamming up his performance so much that it actually made me kinda despise it. Normally, guys, I love hammy acting. But this shit was just too much, even for me. And it kinda ruined his performance slightly, because I could tell that the actor playing Richard/the devil was trying to make it funny, but that shit has to happen naturally. And unfortunately, his performance didn't feel natural. At least, to me, it didn't. As for the rest of the cast, well, like I said, most of them sound rather wooden. And in Eva's case, her acting was kinda shit. But then again, I also have to consider that most B movies don't have the best acting in the world. And I've seen far worse acting from B movies before, so I'm gonna give some of this kinda shit acting a bit of a pass. Well, save for the actor playing Richard/the devil.
Special effects, however, are actually pretty decent. There's not a whole lot of blood in this movie, admittedly, but what little blood effects are here do work rather well. Makeup effects on our devil are decent, for what little time his appearance was in the movie. And I will also say that there were two shots in "Book of Life" that were actually really good. Both of those shots involve half of Troy's face melted off, and that looked really, really good. And that's saying a lot, especially when you consider the low budget that this movie was running on. Even though that first story wasn't great, the special effects in that story were really good, and they were the one thing that kinda saved that story slightly. Overall, special effects in this movie are pretty good.
There's two things I need to talk about involving camerawork. The first thing I need to mention is that, on a few occasions, there are some shots where we get to see the devil's POV. And those shots were filmed using a fisheye lens. For those who don't know, a fisheye lens is kinda like a wide-angle camera, where the lens are used to make things look weird and distorted. And that's what they use for some of these shots involving the devil's POV. They kinda drop this angle about almost halfway into the movie after Richard "dies", and it was probably for the best, because the fisheye lens kinda got old pretty quick. The other bit involving camerawork I need to talk about is during "Snake Eyes". Because throughout that third story, the entire thing was shot on video. And, for the most part, it looks fine, except for some shots that have this yellow and green tint on the camera lens, and it looks ugly as shit! Especially knowing when you see some characters looking more yellow or green than they need to be. I have no idea what kind of a camera they were using when filming this story, but it kinda ruined the story a bit because of how ugly some of these shots were. I kinda wished they would've used a different camera, and it might've helped that story looked a little bit better. Again, that third story was really good, but it could've been filmed better with a different camera. Lighting here is OK, minus the yellow and green tint I just talked about. Sound-mix...oh dear god, the sound-mix. There's one scene in this movie where it showed that the people in charge of the sound-mix did not fucking care. It happens right after the second story, "Perfect Alibi", ends. Our characters are sitting around the campfire talking. And throughout this scene, the sound changes each time the camera focuses on a different character. In one shot, you will hear a lot of noise. And in the next shot, you will hear nothing...the next shot sounds kinda loud...and then it's very loud with the next shot...then kinda loud...and it's all quiet...and it's loud again...and then back to silence. Guys, the sound-mix in that scene was absolutely atrocious. And the half-fucking retarded chimp who was in charge of the sound just did not fucking care during that scene. I don't care how many people were in charge of the sound-mix for this movie. That shit was WAY too noticeable, even for me, who is kinda bound to notice small details such as that. But again, that was not a small detail, because even someone who would watch this movie casually would notice this shit without even trying. And it's all because the people who were in charge of the sound were too fucking lazy to get off their asses and try to fix that shit! Jesus Christ...I'm sorry, guys, but that shit got to me more than it should've.
Anyway, our score in this movie is decent. I didn't recall hearing any piece of music that sounded out of place, so I can certainly say that the score here works fine for this kind of movie. Overall, guys, when all is said and done, can I recommend "Terror Eyes"? No. I really can't, because 2 out of the 3 stories here sucked. And even though that third story was pretty good, it would've looked better if they had used a different camera for that story. The second story is absolute garbage, thanks to it's predictability. And the first story is OK, but it could've been a lot better. Guys, I really can't recommend this movie, unless if you're a fan of B movies. But I've seen B movies that were a lot better than this, both on a technical level, and in terms of content. And in terms of anthology films, this is easily the worst I've seen out of all of them. I was hoping for it to be fun on a cheesy level. And while I got a little bit of fun out this movie, everything else was just shit on top of shit. And that's what "Terror Eyes" ultimately is. It's just a shitty anthology film, and I'm rather disappointed that it turned out that way. Oh man...um...I think I'm gonna go watch a better anthology film. And I kinda want to go and watch "Memories" again. It has been a while since I last saw that movie, so I'm gonna do just that.
Anyway, guys, with that, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all later. Peace.
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