Reaction & Review | Tamara

 

Welcome, one and all, to an all new Reaction & Review. Tonight, ladies and gentlemen, I'm covering a horror movie from 2005. That movie is "Tamara".

Now, I don't know a whole lot about this movie. I can tell you that it's from the creator of the "Final Destination" movies. And I wouldn't have known that, had the blurb on the top of the cover didn't announce it. I should mention that I tried to watch the "Final Destination" films, and I just could not get into them. Mainly because, most of them lacked logic and the only thing that people even cared about those movies were the kills. So already, I'm not entirely sold on this movie because of it's creator's track record. But who knows? Maybe he'll do something good here with this movie since it's not tied with the "Final Destination" films.

While I'm on the subject of tonight's movie, I need to tell you how I came across this thing. You see, when I reviewed "Drive Thru" several weeks ago, it didn't come with just that movie by itself. It came as part of a horror collection DVD 4-pack. Which featured "Drive Thru", two other movies that I'm not really sure I even want to cover for this series, because I was reading the premises on what they were and they didn't really sound like they would be worth watching. And then the other movie was "Tamara." And I chose to cover this movie because the premise is that Tamara ends up being killed after a terrible prank goes horribly wrong. And she comes back from the dead to exact revenge against the people that ended up getting her killed. Which sounds like an amazing premise, because, as has been established before in this series, I really like revenge movies. So this is already sounding promising.

That being said, there are a couple of things that I am a little concerned about. The first thing is that this movie bombed badly at the box office. How badly? Well, the budget was about 3 and half million dollars, and it only made back around $207,000. That is already a bad sign. Now admittedly, that's more of a baseless worry, because I have seen movies that didn't do well financially and I still ended up enjoying them. A real good example of that would be "Raggedy Ann & Andy: A Musical Adventure", which I covered for this series. It wasn't great, but I still ended up, kinda, liking it. Now the other thing that I am concerned about is that even though this movie is a revenge film, that doesn't mean it's going to be any good. Mainly because, I have been let down by revenge films in the past, especially for this series. A couple of good examples would be "Samurai Princess" and "Drive Angry". Hopefully, "Tamara" will be able to break that mold. I kinda doubt it, but I'm gonna hold out hope for this one.

I really want this movie to be decent. Again, it's doubtful, but I'm just gonna see if this thing is even worth watching. And the only way I'm gonna find that out, is if I shut up, and I push play, and I'm gonna do that right now. So, without further ado, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out "Tamara".

5 minutes later

Well, that's...something different. I'm going to assume that this is suppose to be our main character, who seems to be making out with her teacher, I think? And they're making out in the classroom. I have no idea what point this scene serves, but at least it's something different. Oh...I think this is suppose to be a dream sequence. Still, at least we're starting off with something different.

8 minutes later

You know, guys, this story, so far, is looking promising. Do you know what would make it better? If the acting was actually halfway decent. But it's not. And if this is the kind of acting that I have to get use to for the next hour and a half, then I fear I might be in for a torturous hour and a half.

15 minutes later

Wait a second here. So these douchebag high school bullies are secretly filming Tamara, as she's going into this one hotel room where she thinks she's going to meet her high school teacher. One of these high school students that's watching this is someone who cares about Tamara and doesn't want to see her getting bullied. How the fuck does she not know that's Tamara? She's SEEN Tamara at school and should know what her face looks like. I'm sorry, guys, but this is really starting to bug me slightly.

11 minutes later

Hold on a fucking second here. So Chloe admitted that they tried to bury Tamara alive. Even though in the previous scene where it showed that they tried to bury her, she came back alive and killed two of these jerk-offs, and then it ended when Chloe woke up from her dream. So...does that mean what they're experiencing now is a...dream, too? Because if she said that they tried to bury her alive, even though it was nothing more than a nightmare of Chloe's, does that mean that them seeing Tamara is nothing more than a dream, too? Guys, this movie's writing is starting hurt my head, and I am fucking lost here.

9 minutes later

OK, I have another question. It's rather stupid at this point, but I'm gonna ask it anyway. So they DID bury Tamara at the woods. That much is confirmed. All right. So why is Chloe seeing stuff that the other high school bullies can't? She saw a head pop up from where Tamara is supposedly buried at. But the others didn't. Are we going to get an explanation as to how Chloe is able to see this shit that others can't? I hope we get an answer within the next 50 minutes. Otherwise, I'm just gonna be left with mountains of questions that are never going to get answered.

15 minutes later

So Tamara literally has the power to brainwash the people she touches against their will to do what she says. If that is the case, then why didn't she brainwash her teacher to make her fall in love with her earlier on in the movie? If she has that power, why then go through all this bullshit? I understand that I'm putting logic into a movie that seems allergic to it, but, at this point, I just have to ask it because I know that the movie is not knowing to give me a straight answer.

17 minutes later

You know, guys, I understand that this scene is suppose to be tense and dramatic. And I probably would care, if any of these characters had some level of depth. But guess what? I don't. This movie has become boring as shit, and I still got another 18 minutes left of this crap to go. This is gonna suck, guys.

The Review

Well, guys, that was "Tamara". Good lord, that movie was terrible. I'm gonna shut this garbage off...OK. Well, I guess it shows my hand early on what I thought about this movie. Then again, it was kinda obvious throughout this Reaction & Review, but still...what the fuck to even start with?

Let's just start with the writing. You probably noticed throughout my reactions that I was asking a ton of questions. Most of them didn't get answered. And even the ones that did get answered still don't make any fucking sense. But the ones that don't make sense still bother the shit out of me. The biggest instance involves the character of Chloe. Chloe is the one character who doesn't want to see Tamara getting bullied and wants the other bullies to stop. So, these bullies that always bully Tamara set up this prank, where they try to get her to this cheap hotel, because Tamara thinks that her high school teacher called her and wants to be together with her. I could go into great detail about how weird and creepy a student/teacher relationship sounds, but I'm not going to get into that here. So, she ends up going because she thinks that her magic ritual worked. I'll get into that when I talk about the character of Tamara later on. So she ends up getting into the hotel room that the bullies set up, and they begin to film this prank. And it ends up with Tamara getting embarrassed and humiliated as they continue filming her. She ends up getting into the hotel room that they are at, and it winds up with a struggle that ends up getting her killed, because her head gets smashed on the side of a wooden table. Because of what they did, they decide to bury her out in the woods. Now, here's where this whole thing starts to get confusing. So, they end up trying to bury her, but, somehow, Tamara ends up being alive and winds up killing two of the male bullies. And then, for no apparent reason, it ends up with Chloe waking up from her bed because it was a dream. Why does this scene exist? Why is it that we had to have Chloe wake up from her dream, after Tamara ends up killing two of the bullies? Guys, I'm gonna tell you, that entire scene took me out of the movie, because I had so many questions on whether or not this movie was just an entire dream. And guess what? It wasn't a dream. So again, what was the point of having this scene of Chloe waking up from this dream? It makes no fucking sense. If this movie didn't have that scene of Chloe waking up from her dream, then I probably would've given this movie a lot less shit. But because that one scene does exist, it will ruin the entire movie for you, because you'll probably end up asking a ton of questions about this movie yourself. Now, whether or not it was similar to the questions I had for this movie, I can't really say. But that one scene will, ultimately, kill this entire movie for you, and then there's gonna be no reason for you to continue watching this movie. Especially considering that there was no indication or hint of this dream ever happening, because it comes the fuck out of nowhere.

On top of that, we don't get an explanation as to how Chloe sees things that the bullies can't. For instance, why was she the only one that was able to see a head pop out of the grave that they buried Tamara in? Was that too just part of a dream she had? Does she have visions or something? I was really curious about this, and the movie didn't explain shit about that. Now earlier, I had mentioned that this movie was from the creator of the "Final Destination" movies. And it definitely shows, because this movie has the same problems that the "Final Destination" movies had. They are full of inconsistencies and logic issues that make no fucking sense. I could barely get through the 3rd "Final Destination" movie because it was just so poorly written, that I did not want to watch any more of them after that. But there is one difference that separates "Tamara" from the "Final Destination" movies. For all of the crappy writing that the "Final Destination" movies had, at least the ones I've seen, the one thing that made that series unique were the kills. Some people could overlook the crappy writing for those movies and watch the, mostly, cool looking kills. And it made those movies a little bit charming to watch. Mind you, they're not good movies, at least to me they aren't, but the kills is what made those movies kinda worth watching. This movie, on the other hand, has so many logic issues and inconsistencies that it's not something you're going to be able to overlook, unless if you're a horror movie junkie that doesn't care about plot or characters. But since I have more of a tolerance when it comes to characters and story, this movie doesn't have anything that I would consider good in any of those elements. It's just really poorly written, that it's really going to make this movie incredibly hard to watch.

Now, setting aside all the questions that I had for this movie's writing, because I could be here for an entire day talking about all of the inconsistencies that this movie has, let's talk about the characters. Most of them are either unlikable or just don't have any personality to speak of. Most of the unlikable characters are the high school bullies. Which makes sense, because you're not suppose to like bullies, so at least they got that much right. We then have Tamara's high school teacher, who she tries to end up being with, because fuck you, that's why. No seriously, we never get a background as to why she likes her high school teacher, so much so that she ends up trying to make him fall in love with her through a ritual. I'm also wondering as to why when Tamara shows up inside his house, that he never ends up asking how did she get in his house? Or how Tamara knows that he and the high school counselor are going to have a baby. Well, technically, she knows that they've had issues in conceiving a baby. But that's just me adding onto the pile of questions that I have for this movie. Speaking of Tamara, let's finally talk about our main character. Now, I do kinda like the idea of Tamara, as a character. Because she's a timid high school girl who's into witchcraft. And if this character were written better, and was in a better movie, then I think that I would end up really liking this character. Unfortunately, that doesn't happen. Now, before she ends up getting killed, she actually is a likable character...minus the attraction she has for her high school teacher. Anyway, before she ends up coming back from the dead, you can actually sympathize with her, because a lot of people could relate to the idea of being bullied at school. Hell, even I was at a few points. So, on that end, it totally works for the character. What doesn't is when AFTER she ends up becoming this weirdo with magic. And I'm gonna be honest with you, guys, when I say this, everything involving her powers as to how she's able to control people with one touch, or how she's able to have all these weird powers involving people ending up killing themselves, can be summarized by saying fuck you, it's magic. Why? Because magic. Now, I could totally see that this movie wanted to take this character and make it into a psychological horror movie, rather than just being a straight up revenge film. And, as I stated, if this character were in a better movie, or if she was written better by someone who knew what they were doing, then this movie would be amazing. Unfortunately, everything that comes after Tamara's death is just gonna leave you confused and dumbfounded, because this movie was trying desperately hard to fuck with your mind. It does, but not in the good way.

So, writing here is the biggest sin that this movie commits. And to make a terrible movie worse, we also have horrible acting. Now, naturally, when you're given a script that is this poorly written, you can't expect the actors to give out a performance that is going to make this terrible script work. And, for the most part, that is what ends up happening here. Most of these actors are horrible on camera, to a point that some of them haven't even taken acting lessons in their life. The worse instance comes from the actor who plays Tamara's high school teacher. He was awful in this movie. His acting is wooden, if nothing else. And it makes his performance in this movie almost stand out. Now shockingly, the one actress who does turn in a really good showing is the actress who plays Tamara. I believe her name was Jenna Dewan. She was able to polish this turd of a script and make it kinda work. And you know what? I really have to give Jenna Dewan a lot of praise, because she was able to take something this horrible and stupid, and make it work well enough for her. Everyone else was shit, but Jenna Dewan was able to be herself and make her character work. It's just kind of a pity that she had to star in something this terrible, but hey, she tried, and she ended up being the only shining spot in the acting.

Special effects are pretty damn good. And for a movie that had a 3 and half million dollar budget, this has some really good special effects. There is one shot that might've looked fake, which was when this black chick was forced to throw up, and she ends up throwing up her own blood and guts. The problem with the guts is that they look like really cheap cranberries. But then again, that's really only if you were looking for them, and I ended up kinda noticing it, so take it for what you will. My favorite has to go to the kill involving the nerd, who ends up killing himself on camera for the school. It was slow, methodical, and it was one of the few kills that I could say was really cool and memorable. Now, mind you, when I say it's memorable, I don't mean it's something I'm going to remember in, like, a month, but it was still the only really cool kill in this movie. The practical blood here is utilized really well, and the CG is pretty good. Makeup effects are also done really well. So overall, special effects are probably the biggest highlight in this entire movie.

Camerawork here is pretty good. Lighting is well lit. The sound-mix is mixed well. Our score here is decent. It's nothing memorable, but it's still something that is serviceable for this movie. Really, guys, all of the technical stuff works fine. But that's kind of a problem, because you can have all of this really good camerawork, lighting, and sound-mix. But there's one thing that you REALLY need for a good movie to work, which is the writing. And unfortunately, this movies suffers from really bad writing.

So, when all is said and done, can I recommend "Tamara"? No, I can't. There is no way in hell I can recommend this thing, unless, as I've stated before, you're a horror movie junkie who doesn't care about plot, characters, or anything that makes a good horror movie. If you really want to watch something better from Jeremy Haft, the person who wrote the "Final Destination" movies, then go watch the "Final Destination" movies. I, personally, don't give a shit about them, but I know that franchise has some sort of fanbase. As for this thing, avoid it at all costs. This movie was almost a chore to sit through, what with all of the inconsistencies and logic issues that this movie had. But hey, I guess that's par for the course when it comes to Jeremy Haft's writing. So, I'm probably gonna avoid anything else this man has written, because he has proven to me that he can't write for shit. And speaking about this movie being part of a DVD 4-pack earlier, I can already say that half of this 4-pack is not worth the purchase. Because the two movies that I had wanted to watch were both shit, and I have no interest in ever watching any of the other movies in that 4 pack, because I fear they're just as bad as the other two movies I watched for this series. Now, I think I'm gonna go watch a better psychological horror movie. And the first one that comes to mind is "Audition". I'm gonna go watch that, so I can forget that this pile of shit ever happened. And considering that it failed miserably in the box office, it totally deserves to be forgotten.

Anyway, guys, with that, we come to the close of another Reaction & Review. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, take care, and I will see you all in the near future. Peace.